My Life In Months [EDITING]

VI

Nas

I stood by the bridge for about an hour or so. I've been calling her and leaving text messages but to no avail.

I messed up.

I wonder what it'll take to get her to talk to me. I've even been to her house but no one would answer the door. It's been a week now and I'm utterly frustrated. I miss her. I know i messed up but i miss her and  there isn't anything i wouldn't do to get her to talk to me.

'Why?'

I whipped my head around to see her stand not more than five feet away from me. She looked beautiful. Who I'm i kidding? She's always beautiful. Always.

'I miss you' i whisper.

'Why?' She asked again.

'Look, I'm sorry....'

'WHY????' She interrupted me loudly.

She stepped closer to me until we were just a few inches apart. It was then i saw the dried tears, the red eyes, the heavy breathing and the pain written across her face.

'I'M SO SORRY!'

'I DON'T NEED YOUR APOLOGY!' she shouted and the tears flowed. 'All i wanted to know was why?'

At this point i had tears of my own, slowly dripping from my cheeks. My mind a jumbled mess, my heart trying to beat its way out of my chest and my vision blurry.

'Why?' She asked again.

'Because it's not fair.' In the barest whisper but she still heard.

It's about time i come clean.

'Fair?' I can see the anger rising from her face. 'When has life ever been fair?' She shoved me back.

'You have no idea what I'm going through!' I yelled.

'Even though you're the one that's dying, you're being selfish.' Her tears spilling all over her cheeks. 'I don't know what you're going through?' She said bitterly.

'If you haven't been busy trying to make yourself feel miserable about your situation, you would've known my brother died from leukemia. He died from an unsterilized razor after his suicide attempt. He felt so miserable that he tried to kill himself before the cancer could. I'm trying to save you from doing that but all you keep doing is throwing back my attempts at my face.'

'I want to help you because i care about you. Because i love you! But you forget i'm suffering from that too. But the misery is all you want, isn't it?'

'ISN'T THAT WHAT YOU WANNNTT?' she shouted.