I write to keep our love alive||√||

Our First Kiss.

*Edited*

We had just started the 11th grade and had some homework. I was failing in science so you came over to help me out. We were sitting where we always sat,the treehouse in my backyard that me and you built with my dad when we were in the 6th grade,you were sitting on the blue beanbag in the corner of the room and I was propped up on some pillows on the other side of the room with texts books pilled around me and my science book laying wide open propped on my legs I had a pencil in between my lips and was seriously trying to figure a question out, I looked over to see you typing away on your phone "JOHNNY!!"I yelled,getting annoyed because you weren't actually helping me you were just texting Nadia. I hated her. Why you might ask,well because she was taking you away from me,you were falling for her and it was like I didn't exist anymore and it was getting on my last nerve "y-yeah?"you said,barley taking your attention off that freaking phone "whatever I'm done with this sh%#" I threw my pencil down and swung my books out of my way,walking over to the ladder "what did I do now!?"you asked turning your phone off and and tossing it onto the beanbag beside you,not in an angry way.

I scoffed "what did you do? Johnny your not stupid you know exactly what the hell you did!" Your face was full of pure confusion "It's Nadia this and Nadia that! Do I not exist because it seems like I don't!!" I huffed "are you seriously doing this right now?"you asked with a scoff "Yeah I am! You came over here to help me with science not freaking TEXT HER THE WHOLE F#$KING TIME!!" I was fuming if you couldn't already tell.

I rarely cursed and you being my best friend knew that better than anyone "what are you so upset about?!!" You asked,your voice rising a little,which had never happened before but did I care? Nope! "Shouldn't you be happy for me!? I mean I thought you would at least approve it but you've hated her since the moment we told you we were dating!"your voice was now very loud! "I thought you and her were friends? What happened to that?!" You were now yelling and had got up from the beanbag "BECAUSE SHE KNEW!YET SHE STILL DID IT!" A stray tear slipped out of my eye and splashed my cheek "what?" You asked,your voice normal now and the anger you may or may have not felt had disappeared completely"n--nothing!"I stuttered and backed closer to the ladder,ready to get the hell away from you so that this conversation (or fight you could call it) would end.

"No! Your gonna tell me what that meant kenz! You started this and your gonna finish this got it?" your voice was stern and cold and the adrenaline had vanished from my veins,I flinched away from you because it had just occurred to me that this was our first official fight and it was the first time you had ever yelled at me with anger....and it scared me.....you scared me.

"come on! Talk to me or I'll leave!"  you said with a growl. I closed my eyes,keeping the tears that were threatening to fall contained. I couldn't cry,not in front of you the only time I had cried in front of you was in third grade when I found out I had to get braces. Any other time I cried,you weren't around,I made sure of that.I cried a lot these days because I had to see you and Nadia,those were tears that I hid from you for a reason.

I'd been hiding my feelings since 9th grade. And the only one that knew was Her. I had done everything to keep my feelings locked up but as my mother always said, :everything comes out in the washsooner or later'.No lies could be kept forever maybe for a while but not forever. So I guess it was time to tell you,to open up my heart and just let you crush it more than it had already been by you dating Nadia.I opened my eyes and the tears fell,there was nothing I could do to stop them at this point "kenzie I'm getting impatient!"you said,tapping your foot on the wooden floor,I let out a sob "s-she knew"I croaked out "I get that kenz you've made that clear! What the hell did she know is what I'm asking!" The anger was back in your voice and I was scared you would yell so I just spit it out...."SHE KNEW I LOVED YOU JOHNNY! ARE YOU HAPPY NOW!!"I cried,pushing you back. "DID THAT MAKE YOU HAPPY?"I pushed you again with more sobs "ANSWER ME IM GETTING IMPATIENT!"I mimicked you while hitting your chest violently "she k--knew"I sobbed and fell into your chest and you wrapped your arms around me as I cried and violently hit your chest.

When I finally calmed down and realized what was going on I pulled away from your grip and wiped away my tears "I--I didn't know..."you whispered with a frown "of course you didn't know....I'm sorry I even said anything. Why don't we just finish studying and you can actually help me this time" I chuckled with a faint smile,you nodded and we sat down. When I went to grab my textbook you did something I did not expect.

You kissed me.

And I swear sparks flew,it took me a second but once I realized what was going on I kissed you back. And it was the best kiss I had ever had in my entire life,considering I've only kissed one other person I didn't have much to go by or to expect but from what I had experienced it was amazing. It was like you were my air and I was being extra greedy and wanted so much more.

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"Come on kenz!!!!! We moms need a break from our kids. For at least a night!" Nadia begged,I shook my head once again "if I go and something happens to one of my babies I will blame myself for the rest of my life!" I had been like this since your death,worried that something would happen and I'd loose them...."they'll be fine! You need this kenz you haven't been out in forever and I'm not gonna sit around and let my sister in law sulk like this!" Lauren said and I sighed "fine!" Nadia and Lauren squealed "but." I said causing them to turn their attention back to me "on one condition!" I said "and what is that?" Nadia asked "I'm back by at least 8 so I can tuck my babies in!" They smiled and nodded "well duh!! Same for us we have to tuck them in that's a must!" I smiled and stood up from my kitchen counter "well what are you still doing here?? Go get ready!" They nodded and grabbed their purses before hurrying out to their cars. It was 6:30 PM already so I needed to inform the boys that they'd be staying at Aunt Annie's and Uncles Hayden's tonight along with Nadia and Lauren's children. I walked out of the kitchen and into the living room where Jr and Xander were currently watching another movie with John in it. I smiled at them and sat beside Jr on the couch "guess what?" I said enthusiasm laced in my voice "what?" Jr asked as he paused the TV "y'all are gonna stay at Uncle Hayden's and Auntie Annie's tonight along with your other cousins!!"Xander giggled with a huge smile and Jr starting jumping around in his seat "go pack a bag! We're leaving in about an hour,once you finish bring it to me so I can make sure you put everything you need in it and Jr help your brother!" He nodded and they ran off into their room. Tonight was gonna be a blast.

At least I hope.

Xoxo