MY SMILE IS A RIFLE

DARK / LIGHT

Hey People!

So here is chapter 5 and I am VERY excited for you to read this, some of these scenes in this chapter have been inside my head for so long and finally I wrote them down to share them with you!

Feedback is always very appreceated and I'm actually dying to know what you think of this!

PS: I know this chapter is about a pretty senstive issue and I hope it doesn't make anyone feel bad or brings back bad / triggering thoughts or anything, my intention behind this is actually to show everyone who has ever felt really bad that there's a way through this. Look at John and Jolene,they made it...kinda

TAKE CARE!!

♥

( lol ok sorry for the long introduction blah blah here the chapter finally starts ;) )

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Since John's arrival on Floor 5 2 weeks have passed. And since then, You and John had silently sneaked out of the building every night to sit down at 'your' bench. You just always sat there. You would talk about a lot of things, mostly John was talking about new Song ideas, how now he felt about his drug abuse and when he'd be able to actually start his rehab. Sometimes you would lean your head onto his shoulder or he would softly stroke your head. You began to trust him. You never would have thought you'd trust anyone again after you lost so many people in your life, most of your friends had left you because everyone thought you were strange, your intense mood swings made it hard for everyone to stay around you and even though you had your best friend Rony, you haven't heard anything from her anymore since almost a week.

But with John...it was different. Everything was different. Spending these nights outside with him made you blossom into a whole new person, you felt happy again, you had someone by your side who would listen.... But not only listen, whenever you'd talk to him about things you worry, like what your life would be like after the therapy, he would always know how to make you feel safe and calm. " I promise you...You'll be the happiest girl on this planet, I'm 100% sure about it Jo" he once said.

You could feel that he truly cared about you and it made you happier than you have been for a long time. But you cared the same way about him, you wish he'd talk more to you about his past, but you didn't quiet know how to start a conversation about that so you kept hoping one day he'd talk about it by himself.

And well.. there was one thing that really made you go crazy : JOHN HIMSELF. You couldn't get him out of your head. If you could, he'd be everything you'd be talking about during your therapy hours with Mrs. Gati but of course if you did that, she would suspect there was something between you and for patients it was strictly forbidden to start relationships...or just more than simple 'friendships'

Though nothing ever really happened between you and John, you could feel this tension developing between you and him. There was something between you. Your heartbeat got faster whenever you just spend a simple thought on him, his messy long hair or his dark eyes. Or the way he once played guitar for you in the smokers lounge when no one was around. You were fascinated and you had no idea where this thing between you and John was going...but you felt something for him... you felt something... you were happy.

It's now about 11pm and you're standing in front of the big mirror inside your room. You once hated that mirror because whenever you would enter or leave the room, there was no way to avoid a look into that mirror. But being around John kind of gave you new self-confidence and you started to even like what you saw in that mirror.