If I disappear

Eye of the Hurricane

Yoongi

Jungkook only stayed the night when he came to our dorm. His mom was worried because apparently didn't tell her, and he had class that next morning.

I guess that was lucky for is because if we could convince our manager to give him a shot, we wanted it to be a surprise.

So far, we've laid down a plan byt we haven't acted on said plan. Rm stares at the wall, drawing pictures with his eyes, "Should we ask today on our was to practice?" He asks, turning to look at us.

No one replies. After a long silence, Hobi finally says, "Yeah I couldn't think of anything, looks like they can't either. Let's do it." We all nod along, getting up to leave.

When we get to our studio, our manager is waiting for us with a wide smile. Before anyone says anything, Rm starts with our question;

"Who?" He asks, "Jeon Jungkook. He's a friend."

Our manager stares at him for a minute, "Can he sing?"

"Yeah, voice of an angel." I mutter, cocking my head to look at him. "Dance?" I hesitate, "He might need a few classes."

"Bring him in." We all gasp, shocked and joyous.

"Will do!" Taehyung says on behalf of us all. We get to practicing, our dancing is so out of time and not together but in that moment we couldn't care less.

Jungkook

My heart thuds in my ears, a sense of nervousness, of panic overrides me. I've only felt this feeling one other time, after that one time I was used to it because I knew the option of escape.

The Bangtan manager and Bangtan sit in front of me, still as stone, "When you're ready." NamJoon says with a slight smile.

I take a deep breath, preparing myself for one of two outcomes; Either A, I make it and it's fine or B, I don't and make a fool of myself.

One was ideal and the other made me want to curl up in a ball and cry myself to death. You know, just the usual feels.

My eyes wander to Yoongi who in that moment wasn't looking at me or really anything else. He was trapped in his own head again. As I started to sing I felt like if I failed, maybe it wouldn't be so bad.

Everyone stares at me in a weird sense of awe when I finished. They whispered among one another for a few minutes, Yoongi still keeps his focus on whatever is going on in his mind.

The manager then turns to me-

Yoongi

I know I should be listening, I know it's unfair of me to do this to Kooks but at the moment I can't escape my chasing thoughts.

The others are discussing him while I'm trying to not scream at the top of my lungs. They occasionally ask me for my input, I say nothing, just nod.

Rm nudges my arm, I see it. I felt it. He notes how unresponsive I am, feeling either sympathy or annoyance. Both are feelings I wouldn't tie to me.

Our manager says something to Kooks, I know what it is, I heard it. I just can't peice it together.

Maybe they said yes, there's a chance. I can't get my mind away from what I did. I fucked up. What if I slip and they find out? I can't let that happen.