Clueless

Never did I think six months ago I would be where I am today. It all started when I moved to Australia for mums work and started at a new school. Things aren't really different here, I just started hanging out with different people I guess.

"Remi wake up, everything's ready for your first day at school." Mum sounds excited as she yells from downstairs.

I rub my eyes and look around the empty room. It's so white, my old house in America was so different to my new one, so big and colourful, nothing like this.

I craw out of bed, and get ready for school. I'm not loving my school uniform, the dress is light blue with white lines throughout it, a white collar and white sleeves. But I guess it will have to do.

As I do my make up and straighten my hair I look at myself, I've never really been truly happy with my looks, people usually like girls with long blonde hair but I don't get much attention, well I didn't back in America. That makes me doubt myself, a lot. I look down at the almost faded scars on my wrists and hold my hand on them, I don't want this school to end up like my last.

"Hurry up Remi, you're going to be late!" My mother yells and snaps me out of my scary thoughts.

"Yeah coming" I yell back as I tie my hair into a ponytail and pull out bits of hair at the front.

I walk down stairs and out the door to see mum leaning on the car finishing her cigarette.

"Are you ready?" Mum says to me.

"I think so." I say back, sounding nervous.

The drive to the school was short and quiet. I like the quietness, gives me time to be alone with my thoughts and imagination.

Reality strikes as the car stops and I see the entrance of my new school, I am suddenly filled with fear and am caught staring blankly.

"I'm sorry I can't come with you." My mother says breaking the chilling silence.

"It's okay, I should be fine without you."

"Have a fun day, ill be here to pick you up at 3:15."

I smile but don't say anything more. It seems more natural for mothers to tell their children they love them every time they say goodbye, but not my mother. I know she loves me but sometimes an 'I love you' would be nice. I have to stop being silly, I'm never going to get that.