Clueless

Chapter 17

I got home to fine my mom waiting for me to get home.

"Remi." She says as she pats the spot next to her on the sofa for me to sit down. "I'm worried about you Remi, you've changed so much, you don't tell me anything anymore, we used to be so close, you're either out or always in your room. I feel like I don't even know you anymore!"

"Everything is fine, I'm fine." I say back.

"Show me your arms." Mom says, and I slide away from her slightly.

"No." I say.

"Why not?"

"I just don't want to okay!" I yell and I go to get up but she grabs my arm and pulls up my sleeve to reveal the countless fresh and semi-old cuts. I pull away from her and go to walk off it my mothers words stop me.

"You need help, you're going to a therapist." She says.

"You're joking, I'm not doing that." I yell.

"You'll be going Remi, no chance your getting out of it this time. I wanted to send you to one when I saw you self harmed in America but you changed my mind, you did it again so you're going!" She yells.

"That's what you think!" I yell and storm off. Fuck this I'm done. I go into my room and slam the door shut. I go to my bedside table and grab the metal box and head to the bathroom.

I sit on the floor and slice all down both of my thighs, and any room I have left on my arms.

I take out the note I have written and rewritten a million times and put it on the sink. I open the bathroom cupboard and take out the almost all the way full bottle of sleeping tablets. I down the whole bottle and I sit down on the floor leaning on the bathtub. I'm bleeding a lot, but that's okay, it will be all over soon enough.

I can feel myself dozing off but then am awoken from me throwing up. I try to stand up but I'm so weak. I crawl over to the toilet and throw up more, I wish I could keep it down. I finally stop throwing up and I sit down next to the toilet. I am so tired. I close my eyes and drift off, and that's it, darkness.