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1 year later

"charlotte," aubrey sighed, sitting down on charlotte's bed. charlotte looked up at her and groaned.

"what?" charlotte replied, sitting up.

"you've been like this for a year now, char," aubrey shook her head.

"i'm such a bitch," charlotte muttered and slid out of bed, walking into the kitchen of the apartment she shared with her sister.

"you did what was right for him," aubrey reassured her.

"you should have seen the look in his eyes," charlotte shook her head and grabbed a mug from the cabinet.

"charlotte, we're done talking about this," aubrey snapped, causing charlotte to sigh.

"have you talked to mom recently?" charlotte mumbled.

"yeah, she wants you to look into seeing dr. mirk," aubrey ran a hand through her hair.

"no," i deadpanned.

"charlotte, do you not realize that anything that reminds you of him the slightest bit sends you into panic? charlotte this isn't healthy," aubrey shook her head.

"maybe i'll look into it one day, i'm going back to bed," she muttered, turning down the hallway and going back into her room.

{}

charlotte woke up with aubrey pacing around her room. she furrowed her eyebrows and sat up quickly.

"aubs?" charlotte caught her attention. she looked at charlotte sadly and handed her a newspaper. it was turned to the death column.

"charlie," aubrey trailed off as she scanned over the local deaths.

rosa fibs

age: 89

death: january 19, 2014

cause of death: natural causes

stella park

age: 35

death: january 21, 2014

cause of death: illness

michael clifford

age: 19

death: january 28, 2014

cause of death: suicide

charlotte drop the newspaper and started breathing heavily. a sick feeling overcame her all over, she couldn't see properly, her thoughts were at war with each other and she couldn't compose herself enough to speak. aubrey stood there, trying not to panic herself.

"i'm gonna be fucking sick," charlotte managed to say. she stood up and rushed to the bathroom, where she was, in fact, sick.

"charlotte," aubrey put a hand on charlotte's shoulder.

charlotte swatted the hands away and curled up on the tiled floor, crying to herself.

"it's my fault, i shouldn't have put him in there, it's all my fucking fault," charlotte cried. before aubrey could argue there was a knock at the door.

"char, i'm gonna be right back, okay?" aubrey soothed her sister and walked to answer the front door.

she walked quickly, not wanting to leave charlotte alone for so long. aubrey opened the door to be greeted by luke. luke and aubrey had met once when charlotte had dragged her to lunch with him and michael. aubrey sighed and ran a hand through her hair. knowing that such a sweet boy was gone made her feel sick herself.