(LAMS) Oh! So this is Love

Chapter 11

Alex's POV

"John"

This is it. I must have lost my mind. John Laurens was stading right in front fo me in my apartment! I shook my head trying to make sure my eyes weren't playing cruel mind games with me again.

He turned around.

He stared at my face and then he gave me a smile that just seemed so genuinely sweet with just the right touch of shyness that unexpected warmth rushed through me.
Although as sweet as his smile was I still couldn't believe he was there. I conviced myself I was dreaming. I haven't seen him in  six months now. And I know it might not sound like a really long time but for me it felt like forever. 

"What are you..." I did not to take a step foward or move a single muscle scared that he might disappear in a puff of smoke.

He seemed to notice my uneasyness because he walked towards me. His curls moving from side to side by each step he took.

"I'm sorry for coming here without telling you. I kind of wanted to surprise you....and judging by your face I guess I did" he giggled as his hands fidgeted with one of his curls. I figured he might be nervous too.

I had a thousand things I wanted to say but no words came out. A million feelings, a thousand thoughts, hundreds of memories, all for one person... It was overwhelming.

It was too much for my poor heart to take in. I didn't know what to say or how to even feel about this situation. Should I be happy? Or scared that I've gotten to the point I'm hallucinating.  It looks like my body knew exactly what I wanted because without hesitation I threw my arms around his shoulders and hugged him tighly. Tears were welling up at the corner of my eyes. A wave of relief washing over me as I confirmed that this was not a dream. John was really here, between my arms.

It took him a few seconds but he hugged me back just as tight.

I closed my eyes to take in this moment to its fullest, scared this will be the last moment I'd have him like this. I rested my head top of his shoulder. Don't call me a creep but damn I missed his scent so much.

We stayed like that for a few minutes.
A comfortable silence surrounding us. I felt all my worries and tension be pushed away as I melted into the hug.

But as much as I did not want it to end, I had to push him away.

"John... what are you doing here?" I asked, hoping he wouldn't misunderstand my question and get offended.

"I...had to see you. I've been missing you so freaking much Alex" John whispered as he lifted his hand to carress my cheek. "I miss your voice, your smile, your jokes, your hugs, your kisses, I miss my best friend....I'm so happy to see you." He said as he smiled sweetly.

His smile was one of happiness growing, much as a spring flower opens. I could see how it came from deep inside to light his eyes and spread into every part of him. A person smiles with more than their mouth, and I heard it in his voice, in the choice of his words and the way he relaxed. It was beautiful.

"I missed you too" I said, "It was hard being apart from you...not even knowing where you went.."

"I'm sorry" he apologized as he lowered his gaze to the floor.

"What?"

"I'm sorry for taking so long. I needed time to sort out my feelings.." His voice was breaking. "I.....I was scared that if I came back right away and our relationship did not work then I'd really lose you forever. I never want to see you in my future as a stranger Alex. We've built so much together. I never wanna watch you walk by me as if we never met. It will literally kill me inside. I'm so scared of losing you. Althought we've made promises, I'm just scared that those promises won't mean much in the future. I don't know where we're heading. I'm worried.... We started off as strangers and I'm really hoping that we don't end as strangers. I'd not only lose my lover but also my best friend.."