The Forgotten Crown (2019) Book 1 of The Broken Crown Series

25. A Lesson in Hope

Old ways and new ways what was the difference? Which path was right and which was wrong? Maybe they were all right, or all wrong. How was she to know? There were so many mysteries in the world, how was Sirena to know which government or which religion could explain them all? One sunny day she posed her questions to Donovan. The lord paused a moment and watched her face shrewdly.

"The answers you seek are not satisfied by mere words. I can sit here and answer your questions to the best of my abilities but you will undoubtedly have more. These are not questions to be satisfied by head knowledge. They are the stepping stones of a journey you must take. The journey your soul must take."

Sirena felt as if her questions had been dodged. Her expression must have mirrored her feelings for he pulled out several books.

"I cannot tell you what to believe Si, but I can provide you with these" he motioned to the books.

"But I thought my questions couldn't be answered by head knowledge?" she said confused.

"Ah yes, but it is a good place to start. Perhaps they will help you find the right questions."

"Find the right questions? What about the right answers?" she asked, rather flummoxed.

"How do you expect to find the right answers without first finding the right questions?"

Sirena had no reply. She hesitated before asking her next question. Would she be overstepping? Things between them had been tenuous at best as of late. "Might I ask what it is you believe?" Cringing she forced herself to look at his face. A slight smile met her sight.

"Read these first and I shall answer every question you desire as capably as I can, including my own beliefs" he added when she looked slightly crestfallen.

The scent of musty books tickled her nose as she fought back the urge to sneeze. Eager fingers unrolled the delicate parchment, feeling the brittle material with wonder. It amazed Sirena that she could physically touch the knowledge her mind was about to devour. It was like a small piece of history had been locked away to be re-lived anytime she wished. All she had to do was pluck it from its place on the shelf and it was all hers.

Sirena was free to travel back and forth in time at will. Such a gift was denied most. Why if the people of Nogare knew of their own history, that the first rulers of this country were magic users, nay not even human, Sirena could only imagine the panic that would ensue. Were she to go trumpeting their lineage in the streets, she had no doubt her stories would grant her a swift and painful death.

Scrolls on philosophy and modern day science often left her feeling she had more questions about the world around her rather than fewer. Sirena soon learned that was the nature of the subject; to question the world around her, rather than to accept the blind truths of superstition. Learning the world was round and that she would not float off into the ether of Hvedran's lair should she choose to take up sailing had been astonishing. To believe she could travel in a circle around the world and arrive at the same point she had started was simply unbelievable. Thinking herself to be clever she challenged Donovan. "Why is it maps are flat if the world is round?"

To his amusement and her chagrin, Donovan produced a large round sphere which he called a globe. A detailed map of the world rested upon its smooth surface. "Can you imagine travelers carrying one of these every time they wished to go somewhere?" The idea produced an image so ludicrous in her brain she was hard put not to fall off her chair from laughing so hard.

Sirena's favorite scrolls were the histories; so many people and places and things she never dreamed existed. So many stories that moved her. The fantastic illustrations painstakingly drawn in so many different colors. To her, these scrolls felt priceless. A whole new realm of possibilities blossomed in her head.

Piece by piece the puzzle was coming together, a larger picture was forming. While physically limited by the laws of the world and time and whatever forces spun the earth, her mind did not have limits. There were no barriers to cage her imagination, or more importantly her heart and soul. For the first time in her life, Sirena realized her true freedom did not rest in physical circumstances but in her mind. No cage could truly imprison all of who she was; such a concept felt vastly alien and yet empowering. Sirena tried to convey these new ideas with Donovan one afternoon in the solar.

"You've come a very long way in such a short time Si" he remarked. "Now tell me how this could be used as a weapon."

Sirena sat for a moment her brow knit in concentration. "A weapon?"

"Well think of the theory you have just so passionately spoken to me about. Do you really still believe all weapons are physical?" Fox watched her face as he saw the glimmer of an idea take hold. "This idea has you excited, why does it mean so much to you Si?" Fox asked benignly.

"Because I've spent most of my life as a slave! If I knew such things, if I knew I had the power to...to..." she struggled to express herself. "To be free! To think as I want, to act as I want, to just BE more than I was! I..." her voice trailed off as the idea sunk in. Her mind wandered back to a night that seemed a lifetime ago with Letty and Bea. They sat under the stars and dreamed of running away. The idea had taken hold of them and life was simply not the same afterwards.

Possibilities flew through her brain. Ideas, lives; people she knew and those she didn't; the impact such an idea could have, astounded her. The power of an idea was indeed the most potent weapon she had ever heard of.

Fox could see clearly the awe and intense emotion on her face. The story of the servant boy and the king, it all made sense to her now. "Never underestimate the power of one man Si," he spoke softly, placing a hand on hers "Or one woman" he said intently.

Her eyes snapped to his, hot passion, emotion, and an urgent desire for retribution blazed out at him. She had the power to see wrongs righted. "If one man has so much power, imagine what several can do." Fox said in earnest. "Imagine-"

Sirena cut him off. "Imagine what an entire oppressed nation can do" she uttered with soft conviction.

A grim determination settled over the pair. "This will not be an easy road Si." Donovan's grip on her hand tightened.

"I know" she paused. "But how can I not act? My people need me and I them." Sirena could feel an ache rise in her heart like that of a mother for her lost babe. She had finally decided to take up the cause. The soul of her nation, of her people, waited to be rescued. Her desire to fight no longer felt futile or foolish, for she had finally learned to hope.