break my heart | e.c

Just say you've found somebody else

Let's talk about the time when you broke my heart for the millionth time. This shouldn't be a surprise anymore because it was the same old shit.

I start to think that maybe you have feelings for me but they end up crushed when I find out that you're in love with someone else. What's worse? I never found this out by you.

About four months had passed and everything was great between the two of us. My whole friends with benefits with Richard stopped but we remained close friends. You never told me but you really seemed relieved because of that. Stupidly enough, I did it for you, thinking that maybe this was my chance, our chance. How dumb was I...

You left to promote the new single but you would be back soon. Our regular FaceTime calls which usually took place around ten began to become less frequent. You would put excuses saying that you were tired and that'd you call the next day. I chose to believe you because why would I doubt my best friend? Why would he lie to me? Plus, I understood. You just played a whole show so the exhaustion was logical.

You got caught though. It was a month before you were due to return and we hadn't been talking. I would send a small good luck text and all you would send back was a yellow heart emoji. What I'm trying to say here is that you basically didn't have much time for me. I tried to put myself down by telling myself I'm just a friend and nothing more.

Christopher, like his normal self, was bored and decided to FaceTime me. He was showing me some of the stuff your fans had thrown on stage. Richard got a pair of panties and Joel got avocados. With the camera on them, I saw you walk behind them. An hour ago you had told me you were going to sleep, in your pj's already. I didn't see that. I didn't hear that.

"Y tu, papa?" Christopher asked you teasingly. "Para donde vas?"

You checked your phone once more before letting it slide inside your pocket. "Voy a salir un rato."

"Va salir con Flor!" Zabdiel said but his body not in the view.

The boys, expect Richard, hollered and applauded you all meanwhile you blushed. I decided not to say anything because I hadn't heard a single thing about this girl.

Once you left, Richard stole the phone from Christopher which resulted in a small game of chasing. Richard already knew what I was going to ask. He sensed that I didn't know a single thing about this girl, let alone her existence.

"He hasn't told you, has he?" 

With a shaky sigh, I shook my head. "No, who is she?"

"Flor is our sub-professional photographer. She's just a sub until our regular one comes back. She started with us since the beginning of the promotion and so I guess her y Erick kicked it off really good."

"Solo amigos?"

"That's the thing..." Richard trailed seemingly nervous. "They've been seeing each other for a month now. Bueno, I don't know. They've kissed apparently."

"Wow, he's so fucking quick! No puede estar solo por mucho porque el chiquito ya está buscando chica!"

I didn't want to look at Richard because I knew that his eyes would only show pity for me. Richard tried to have me meet new people but as much as I tried to forget about you, my stupid heart didn't want to stop loving you. My idiotic mind thought that we would have a chance. It sounds so pathetic now because how could I love such an asshole?

"Don't get mad, no es bueno para ti mami. Remember what we talked about? Don't let the things he does get to you."

"I give up, Rich," I defeatedly say with a small pout. "Things with Erick will never go past friendship. I'm only hurting myself and that's not healthy."

Richard tenderly smiled at me before winking at me. "I think it's the best thing to do."

"But what annoys me is that he doesn't tell me these things. Rich, we're supposed to be best friend's. Why is he always hiding this stuff from me?"

"Now that's something you'd have to ask him yourself."

I waited because I wanted to see how long you would take to tell me. I thought that maybe you were going to tell me when you went official with the girl but you never did. Richard told me that you had announced it two days after I found out. Two weeks passed and you still hadn't told me. Laugh at me, my logic was that since you hadn't told me anything yet then your family probably didn't know anything as well.

I was wrong.

I was too concentrated looking for the cheese my dad wanted when I felt a hand pat my back gently. Your mother stood there with a smile and open arms. We talked about me but she couldn't help but talk about her lovely son and how he's doing what he loves. And what do you know? She mentioned the girl, your girlfriend.

I'm not saying that I deserve to know things before your mom but I thought that you would tell us at least the same day or a day later. Honestly, it sounds so stupid how hurt I was then.

I decided to call you and confront you. Surprisingly enough, you picked up. You had just finished a show so you had some free time for me.

"I feel like I haven't talked to you in so long, Mica." You susurrate through the phone. "How are you?"

"No tan bien como tu," I bitterly responded.

"What's wrong? What do you mean by that?"

I let out a haughty laugh, "I bumped into your mom a few days ago and she told me something que me dejo fria."

You knew what it was. You stayed silent as if trying to think of an overused apology, which by the way, had become very frequent in our friendship.

"Mica, yo te lo iba a decir... but I didn't know how." You said trying to excuse yourself.

"What do you mean? Erick, we're best friends we're supposed to trust each other. May I remind you this isn't the first time you keep something from me. Do you not trust me?"

This is where I already should have doubted about our friendship. I did, for a minute, but you were quick to apologize and say things that made my heart tremble. You had such a way with words that even if you were saying things in a friendly way, I took it another way.

If I could turn back time I would shut you up every time you tried to sweet talk me because that's what tripped me up.

Because every time you came with somebody else on your mind, you just tore me apart.