Beautiful and Broken

CHAPTER TWENTY

"Every soul shall taste death"

If tears could bring our loved ones back then my tears would have brought them all back. I've cried to the extent I can cry no more. My tear glands are dried up and I'm out of tears. Today I have lost a big part of me. My Bestfriend is gone. The person who I couldn't tell my story without mentioning her name.

"Zee lokaci yayi" Mummy said over the phone admist her cries

It took me about 2 minutes to absorb the news.  I called Zee's number out of confusion. I called her several times and it wasn't reachable. I wore my clothes and left for her In laws house immediately. On reaching there I saw many cars and lots of people there. I still didn't believe it. How did she even die? I kept on asking myself. Nobody even cared to call me to tell me she was dying or anything.

I entered the house and everyone was looking at me like some crazy lady but I cared less. Zee's room was filled up with so many people which were mostly her husband's relatives. I stood by the door and everyone moved away from the bed. There she was, sleeping peacefully as if she was going to wake up at any minute. My girl was gone. She was gone forever. I broke down there seeing the new born baby girl in Umma's hand. So innocent and beautiful. Zee laid peacefully on the bed covered in lakafani leaving only her face opened.

I burst in to tears. Tears I couldn't control. I had gotten broken once more but it felt new. Every person I loosed had his own type of pain. I thought I was used to this, but I wasn't. I wanted this to be a dream. I wanted someone to wake me up and tell me I was dreaming. I wanted that so bad.

"It is time to take her" Abdulhameed, Zee's husband said to us and about five men came inside to carry her. It was time to say our final goodbyes. My girl was going to a land of no return and it hurts so bad.

_____

My family and my bestfriends all took the next flight to Kano while Yusuf was unaware of anything. It was agreed that no one will tell him anything until he was done with his seminar. I needed my husband by my side so bad. It was hard pretending to him that everything was alright when it wasn't. We've lost a very large part of us.

"Mamiii" Jaleelah called my name interrupting my thoughts. Just by mere looking at her she reminded me of Zee and tears clouded my eyes. She was the carbon copy of Zee. Her smile, her eyes, her nose and everything was just like Zee's.

"Yess baby" I replied putting her on my laps.

"Where's Ammah" she asked sadly. Her expression broke my heart.

I cupped her cheeks in my hands and said to her, "You've heard about that beautiful place called Jannah, right?" She nodded affirmative. "Ammah has gone to stay there. She has gone to rest" I completed my sentence with lumps in my throat, trying so hard not to break down in front the six years old.

"Alfeenah and the baby will miss her so much" she said while playing with the tip of my hijab.

"She misses them too. But Daddy will make sure you girls don't miss her too much. Whenever you miss her you can always write her letters and keep them safe in a box" I smiled at her weakly. "We'll write them together, hmn?" She nodded and I hugged her so tight.

My whole family from Lagos and Gombe arrived later that evening. Including my bestfriends. It was all cries, cries and prayers at first before everyone settled down. Zee's mum was still in Abuja together with mummy too. The rest of us will be going to Ya Abubakars house in Abuja to join them after the three days prayers. We needed each other. I needed my husband too.

My phone became a hot line. Receiving calls from known and unknown numbers, either they wanted to confirm if the news was true or wanted to send their condolence. Alot promised to come pay their condolence visit while others just prayed and apologised for they will not be able to make it. Whichever it was I was indeed grateful.