"I suppose all great happiness is a little sad. Beauty means the scent of roses, and then the death of roses." - F. Scott Fitzgerald
Robyn was in Florence, Italy to debut her new collection, and the excitement surrounding her was palpable. She couldn't wait to showcase the collection she designed with her team––– her clothing line made of Italian and French made pieces. The clothes were designed to speak to the intricacies of her, her style, and black women as a whole. Her brand was expanding, and she was breaking down barriers for women just like her––– her dreams were continually coming true.
Since the surprise marriage proposal on the beach of her hometown, her and Chris' relationship was better than ever. Marrying him crossed her mind once or twice, but when she saw him get down on one knee, it was evident she thought about it more than that. He had a place in her heart no one ever could have, though it wasn't easy, they were still going to have their happy ending, and she would make sure of it. No matter what.
Sitting by the window of her hotel room––– she sipped her Earl Grey tea while smiling to herself. Chris really made drinking tea apart of her morning routine, it was theirs, and she enjoyed doing it every morning with him. The sky was a beautiful red, as crimson as her last hair color. Rays of golden pink were centered around the sun, and it reminded her of soon to be husband. She appreciated life more because it conspired them to meet each other, be together, and she hoped that it would help them remain together. Her hopes must have been heard by God because a change was happening within her that would add to the euphoric energy she was experiencing in her life currently.
Her attempts at convincing Chris to accompany her to Italy failed with him politely declining. His reasoning was he wanted to remain low key as possible, and he didn't want to have the attention to be diverted from what was important––– her and her fashion. It was disappointing, but she understood. Though she was suspicious feeling like something would go wrong. She didn't know who it pertained to, but it was alarming to her. His attitude change was apparent since she flew to Italy, and he was a little more solemn lately than usual. Why did she have this feeling of dread?
The 4th day in Florence she chose to give the festivities a rest for the night. She was the life of the party, her shows were tremendously successful, so she took a reprieve. Her thoughts drifted to her fiancé, and since she accomplished everything, she thought about leaving Italy early to get back home to him. Her phone ringing brought her out her thoughts, and she swiped right not bothering to look at the Caller ID.
Before she could answer, she heard a frantic voice on the other end, "ROBYN GET HERE NOW."
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Chris' intentions to not accompany Robyn and encourage her to go to Italy alone was because he had a plan. It was a plan that needed to be carried out while he was alone. He couldn't do it while she was here because what he wanted to execute was far too sinister for her sweet nature to witness. Ironically, the sweetest thing he's ever encountered and has had the privilege of knowing was the byproduct of him wanting to die. It was strange, but to him, having to remain in the dark when he had someone who radiated so much light was cruel. He made an effort to ignore that emotion, but as the months passed by, it intensified. Hopelessness was the last emotion he wanted to plague his conscience, so he was going to blow his brains out.
He planned this back in Barbados, which was a small part of the reason why he proposed. His plan was once she had his last name, he would write his will, and she would have all his possessions. Eventually, he decided against wanting to have the wedding so soon because it wouldn't happen. He was going to die and how selfish it would have been to marry her, only to not be alive long enough to spend the rest of his life with her. It was selfish. He felt like he would've trapped her by doing that, and that wasn't what he wanted to do. She deserved to live her life, not be burdened by being the widow of a broken blind man. He thought about children briefly, but having mirrored reflections of him wouldn't help her cope with his death, should they look like him. He didn't want them to look like him, much less be like him.
