The Adventures of Britknee Bicht: a HASS Travelogue

Chapter 9 - The Lizard

The next day i was getting ready to go to the Empire State building and i looked out my window and saw Shawn Mendes hanging from my window frame. What the Hell? Is this dude a stalker? We broke up like yesterday im already over him. Shawn screamed because his arm fell off and he plummeted to the ground. Lucky he is part lizard so his arm would grow back. Something i'm not allowed to say because it was in our NDA. I shut the window and ignored him because eww who wants to date only a bit famous shawn mendes when you can date superstar harry styles, lets be real. I left my apartment wearing a forever 21 graphics tee that says i love tacos and a pair of gucci black skinny jeans. My long brown hair with pink highlights was put up into a messy bun. Harry was waiting for me at the bottom of the stairs and omg guess what? he was wearing the same outfit as me. Complete with the same hairstyle and pink highlights. #couplegoals We made our way out, stepping over shawns armless body, and got into a taxi. Turns out it was unlicensed and we were being kidnapped by the russian mafia. Not again! We went round the corner in front of the Empire State Building and we both tuck and rolled out the car to the top of the tower. The view was good but not as good at the pretty girl standing next to harry styles, haha thats me! From here, i could see shawns arms still attached to my window frame it was pretty gross but oh well. We contemplated going to the public library but decided against it cause whaddup? im jared im 19 and i've never learnt how to read. Harry suddenly got a really important call and had to fly from the top of the building to the ground. I was now a girl all alone in New York City. I walked around some other tall new york things and tripped right into the arms of a gorgeous handsome stranger. I knew who it was; the one and only Patrick Alwyn, brother of the one and only Joe Alwyn who was dating the one and only Taylor Swift.