Philophobia (prucan because I'm a sucker)

Little Date

*yo, bit late, I broke my phone, good to be back and good to have ya back. Enjoy!*

It's the day of my 'little date' and Alfred has come to make sure I actually go, and of course, make sure I wear something he deems acceptable.

"Mattie, goddammit, you can't just go in your pajamas! You need to impress him!" he says as he rummeges through my drawers.

"But why though?! I didn't even ask to go on this date! You were the one who texted him!" I yell back at him, sitting on the bed in my pj's.

"well it's too late now and I'm not letting you cancel, so suck it up, shut up, and button up!" he throws a white button up at me and turns back around to face me, hands on his hips.

"I'm not wearing this," I say, "it's a date at a coffee shop not a five star restaurant."

Alfred rolls his eyes and goes back to digging in my dresser and muttering to himself, "fine, wear fucking plaid, like you always do. Jesus."

___________________

We're standing outside the bar where I met Gilbert and I have never been more nervous in my life.

"Okay, he's not supposed to be here for another five minutes. Maybe if I just leave now then he'll forget me and not text again." I started pacing about three minutes ago and now I can't stop. Whatever, it's justified.

"Matt, no. I came to make sure you go on this date and I'm not leaving until he picks you up." Alfred is leaning by the door of the bar, looking mildly annoyed.

"Why are you doing this to me, Al?" I sigh.

Alfred pushed himself off the wall to drape a arm around my shoulder. "because it's funny, dude. Plus, you need to get back on your feet." I roll my eyes and push him off my shoulder and walk a few steps. "come on man, it's been like six years! You gotta get your ass back in the chess game at some point and be the fucking king of it all!"

"the king is the weakest piece, Al. A smart player keeps them safe and protected, which is exactly where I would like to be right now! At home and in my bed, in a blanket burrito where I belong. Alone."

"Good god, you painful nerd." Alfred sighs, "at least try okay? For me?"

"Oh my god, fine, asshole! But I'm not going on a second date."

"Hey, Mattie!"

Shitshitshitshi

Alfred grabs my hand and sticks it up for Gilbert to see, before waving it around frantically while I facepalm and groan audibly.

"Hi, I'm Mattie's older bro, Alfred, but most people just call me Al!"

"We're twins, you absolute buffoon." I mumble under my breath. Alfred elbows me in the stomach and continues smiling at Gilbert with an outstretched hand

"oooh, looks like someone has a sharp tongue!" Gilbert chuckles and takes Alfred's hands, "I'm the awesome Gilbert, as you probably know already."

"Yeah, my bro's a bit uptight. I'm here to make sure he didn't  chicken out at the last second."

"Alfred. Shut. The Fuck. UP."