the journal of life

Chapter 22

I feel his lips push Against mine. I could taste the liqueur on his lips. As well as the mint gum he had chewed a while ago. I wanted to stop but I couldn't... I didn't want to. I feel his hand lower down my back pushing me on himself. I tangled my fingers in his curls, feeling the nots and softness of his hair. The kiss lasted a minute or something like that. Or at least it felt like that. He lowered his head to the nuke of my neck and leavening it to hang there. I stood socked. I didn't know what to say or do.

" how was that for a new memory.," he mumbles on my neck. Then lifting his head and looked at me. His greenish eyes twinkled. Waiting for an answer. I made sure to pick my words wisely as I opened my mouth to speak.

" um it was pretty good. Iv had better." I said looking at him. Which was a lie. The only good kisser iv ever kissed was Alejandro but whatever. There was soo May things I wanted to say to him but I was to scared evan to speak. I see him smirk in the darkness.

" oh well that wasn't my best. Let me try again then." He lowered his head to my lips and stopped. I feel my lips quiver . I didn't speak as he got closer. I do like him...? That was the question. Maybe I did. And I didn't know it. Which was weird because I usually know when I like someone. Like Ashton, Alejandro and the rest, but all he did was confuse me. He wasn't as muscle sexy like Alejandro or mysterious like Ashton or any other thing. Wes is simply confusing. His change in mood annoys me but also intrigue me. I can feel my self crumble as placed a kiss under my jaw. He moved his lips slowly to my cheeks and on its way to my lips.

" stop" I say. Wes pulls away his greenish eyes were dark and hasty. I suddenly regret stopping him. There was a pause. A moment where we only stared at each other. I thought over all of my movement, In a moment to weakness I gave up. I plant a kiss on him. His reaction was hard and quick. Wes wraps both his arms around my waist. He plays with my Long hair as he kissed me. My grip on his shirt tightened as he sucked my lower lip. His hand leaves my lower back and god down my thigh. His hand pressed against my Skin. With out noticing I suddenly find my hands down the top of his shirt. I felt the smooth of his back. Plan and slat. His hand wonder from my outer thigh to my inner thigh marketing me jump. From there I had to stop. What was happening was bound to have a bad ending. I pull away. At that he back a few steps away from me

" sorry... I.. I dint mean to make you uncomfortable." I hear him mumble as he back against the hallway wall. I pull my hair back so I was out of my eyes.

" it's fine." I leaned forwarded so I was only a step away from him.

" we should go. It's getting late ." He said picking up my hoodie which I didn't realized I had dropped. We walked to the door awkwardly.

" need a ride guys" a drunk voice says behind is. I look around my shoulder to find sky. Wes speaks

" yea sky we do actually." He lipped his hand to his hair.

" here my friend ed is leavening he could give you a ride." She pointed to the blond with the grey eyes. With a finger motion ed walked us out of the house.

***

Once we were back in the hotel. I went straight to my room. Gladly no one noticed Wes and I were gone half of the night. I check Nadia's phone for the time and I gasp as the numbers say 3:00am. In 4 hours exact me we would be put on the road. I jump slowly into bed next to Nadia making sure she would not wake up. Thoughts raced throw my mind. Wes and the kiss. I was scared and confused. Not only because I didn't know if it was an actual kiss or if he did it cuz he was drunk but because I liked it .

***

The next morning I woke up with a headache and my feet hurt from all the dancing. From out of the room I hear yelling and people arguing. I turn to the opposite side of the bed where Nadis side was empty. I slip into my flip flops and weakly walk out of the room. On the couch I see Wes and to the side I see jack.

" ha so you decided to wake up." He said with a tone he never used. I gave him a wtf look. I look from jack to we and the rest.

" what the hell is going on?" I say taking a Advil for my bag.

" you and Wes going to a part at 2:00 in the morning that's what." I froze.

" wha. What are you talking about we I... We" i was interrupted my Wes voice.

" he knows."

" well it wasn't 2:00.. Just to clear that up." I point my finger at jack.

" Alex ... My dearly Alex .. You drank your not even 17!" He said in a more calmed voice. I hated when he got like this. He was my ex boyfriend not my dad. Infect this whole trip was to escape my parents.

" whatever .. Imam go change ill Waite in the car." I turned around and went to change. When I was out I made my way to the car. Were only pepper was. She had here head against the window with her eyes closed.

" I sat next to her awkwardly. This whole 3 day she had not said a word to me. I was about to start a conversation but she spoke first.

" get away from Wes. All he is gonna do is brake you." She said is a winery voice. I paused.

" what the hell?"

" exactly" he said as Nadia came into the car.

" umm that's not how it works pepper." I said as I moved to the back with jack. The rest of the way non of us said anything. We didn't even hear music.

***

" bi everyone" I shouted but was mostly looking at Wes. As I left into my building. I go up to my floor and hesitate as I get closer to my door. I waited for a minute and two and then opened my door. I stopped in shock. Half of my house was full of boxes. I make my way to my kitchen. Where my mom stood cooking.

" what's going on? I thought we were moving to jacks house in two weeks?"

" yea we were but we found a big place faster then we expected so were moving in a week and 3 days." She said in her normal voice. I was speech less. I wasn't ready to move , I had friends to say bye to. To hang with. I couldn't move.... I couldn't!!!

I just stood there quietly frozen in time.