Atonement

Chapter 4

When Anko got a closer look, she realized that the exhausted shinobi was nobody else but the prodigy Kakashi Hatake. However, that boy in front of her didn't look like a prodigy. The boy looked tired, exhausted, and half dead. His silver hair was messy, his skin ghostly pale and his eyes were red and puffy from, what she assumed, crying.  

Quietly she made her way down to the sleeping boy, but before she could even touch the floor, she was pinned to a tree by no one else than Kakashi himself. His eyes were still a bit clouded from sleep but the coldness and suppressed hatred in them made Anko shiver in fear. If he looked like this when he was still half asleep then she really didn't want to see what he looked fully awake or fighting. 

A quiet scream escaped her when she saw a kunai pointed at her neck. This seemed to wake the dangerous boy up completely since he let her free immediately and took a few steps back. 

"Sorry, Anko. Are you hurt?" 

Although Kakashi was calm outside, on the inside he was a nervous wreck. Anko had surprised him and his reflexes got the best of him. Being a fighter in the Fourth Shinobi War had marked him. He was always alert, never sleeping too deeply, not thinking about his next move, and only having one ambition: to fight and survive another day.

Anko was still shivering slightly as she shook her head. How did Hatake-san even know her name? 

"No, I'm fine Hatake-san. But are you alright? You seem exhausted." 

Anko wasn't sure if it was a good idea to ask him and when he tensed slightly she knew it wasn't. 

"Sorry," she whispered, feeling uncomfortable. 

"No, it's alright. I was just training. By the way, please call me Kakashi or anything but Hatake-san." answered Kakashi trying to make his past friend a bit more comfortable. 

"Sure thing, Kakashi-kun." Anko grinned widely and slowly she regained her confidence. Kakashi was still weird but she wouldn't press on that matter.

A thought crossed her mind that made her want to jump in excitement. 

"Say Kakashi-kun, can we be friends?" she asked not knowing what her innocent question did to the boy.

Kakashi felt his heart stop. Friends? With Anko? He was never really close to her before. She was just a teammate from his ANBU squad. 

But he got a second chance to live. 

To change things.  

To... atone for his failures and mistakes. 

Atonement... 

He didn't deserve a friend! 

He let his previous friends die. What if the Anko died by his hand too? He didn't deserve... 

"...kashi-kun, Kakashi-kun. Hello? Somebody home?" 

Anko waved her hand in front of Kakashis face although she refrained from touching him. She didn't want a repeat of the earlier events. 

"No." 

Kakashis answer was cold and blunt and he knew he hurt her with it but he was here for atonement, not to be happy. 

"I don't deserve to be your friend. You should stay away from me, it would be better for you. Goodbye Anko."

Kakashi couldn't look her into the eyes and turned around to get out of the forest of death. By now his father had surely realised that he was missing. 

Anko was left dumbfounded and couldn't understand what happened. Sure, she knew that there hadn't be a high chance of her befriending Kakashi but she thought it was because she was the one not deserving his friendship. But instead he had told her he was the one who didn't. She knew that there was a chance that Kakashi had just been polite but she had heard that he was quite arrogant, so why should he? And she also felt as if he was lonely. His walk had been slightly bend as if he was holding a heavy burden. He was a mystery. And this intrigued Anko to no end. Her eyes sparkled. She would get him to be her friend no matter what! Her first friend, she reminded herself.