Best-Case Scenario

Chapter Three

Thank goodness lunch isn't until fifth because it takes me the next three classes to gain my composure. I don't run into Kali during that time so I meet her right before lunch in minor panic mode.

When she spots me, her eyes light up. "Did you see him?" Kali slams her locker closed and we begin our walk to the cafeteria.

"We talked," I say.

Of course, this is not enough. She elbows me in the ribs. "And? Any revelations? I haven't seen him at all. Did he say anything?"

"Not much but yeah," I say. I undo the end of my braid, finger combing out the tangles. "He's been here for three weeks."

"Ouch."

Perfect summary.

I go on to the other bits. "Yeah. Said he tried to look for me at the parties."

Kali snorts and slams her locker. "He really does sound different."

It's true, he does, but somehow in a good way. Kali and I don't hang out with the athletic types really. Carla's on the soccer team, but she's not good enough to be in the circle who goes to parties. If she really wanted to go, she was always invited, but claimed it wasn't her scene. We used to be our own little group: Carla, Kali, me, and two guys, Seth and Imari. With the get together and then the break-up, that group fell apart.

I liked that Finn wasn't the exact same person. It was nice to have a change that isn't jarring. He plays soccer and puberty worked out well for him. He didn't ignore me. He apologized. That has to count for something.

"He is different, but he wants to have lunch with us. It's not like we were really that social this summer."

Kali's eyes drop down to the floor and she starts tapping her fingers against each other. "Sorry," she says.

I roll my eyes. Sometimes her anxiety can be infuriating. I grab her elbow and push her toward the staircase with me. "Stop it. Even if we weren't hanging out, I wouldn't be going to parties. And we weren't together that much at the end." I say that last part quietly but Kali hears it and the awkwardness fills the space between us.

She looks up and this time, doesn't have a smile. Her eyes are big and worried.

"It's fine," I say and try to look confident about that.

Kali's eyes are still on mine. "Are you sure you don't want to talk-"

"No," I say. Definitely not. That will not help. I think those parts but say, "It happened. Let's go see what Finn has to say." When she doesn't move, I pull her by the elbow again. "Come on."

That afternoon two weeks ago wasn't the first time Kali and I kissed. When we were in ninth grade, we played spin the bottle at a party. The only catch was that it was all girls. Half of the group was already out including Kali. When I spun the bottle, of course it landed on her. Only one girl said it was weird because Kali was my best friend and I was straight but the others insisted we followed the rules and so we did. She gave me her usual smile and I smiled back. It wouldn't be terrible. If I had to kiss a girl, well, at least it was my best friend.

I crawled over to her and kissed her and well...

It wasn't terrible. It wasn't even bad. I even felt something. Nothing earth shattering but something like I felt when Finn kissed me. A warm tingle in my belly and a difficulty meeting her eyes right after.

And instead of saying something to her about it after, I acted like it was totally normal. The next person went but I saw Kali's confused expression. I decided to ask Cameron out the next day. I fell in what felt like love. Then we broke up and I continued dating boys because I liked them. I decided the feelings I had when I kissed Kali was just a weird moment.