liar (shizaya)

Chapter 19: Lonely pt2

Lonely part 2
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He felt weak.

His tears still fell down his face rapidly, soaking the one giving off this warmth's shirt.

For a moment, he forgot about everything.

"I love you, Izaya." A voice said.

His eyes widened. It couldn't be....

"Mom?"

He brushed his fingers through her hair. It was real. This was real, right?

"I love you so much, Izaya."

Her voice was soothing, so calming. It hypnotized him.

"I love you too, Mom" He said to her back.

He returned the hug, with a small smile on his face.
..
....
I wish this would last...
.......
..........

"I don't love you, Izaya.

I hate you,

Everybody does."

..........
.......
But it's all a a lie. You never really loved me.
....
..

He pushed her away. It was then he realized it was all a hallucinationlike, like a dream, just his mind playing games with him.

He saw in front of him, Namie on the ground, staring at him. He'd mistaken Namie as his mother.

He quickly got up from his desk chair and left without saying a word. Not even sorry.

"Izaya, wait!"

He ignored her. Last thing he needed was to be laughed at.

He was going to close the door from his bed room, but she pushed it open before he could even close it.

"I said wait."

Izaya sighed. He proceeded to sit on edge of his bed, Namie following along.

"We need to talk, Izaya."

"About what? If you're going to laugh-"

"Look, usually I would laugh, but now I don't know. I can't laugh at you now even if I tried. Seeing you like this is just weird to me. And I'm just trying to talk some things out."

He stayed quiet and waited for her to continue.

"To start, Izaya...is it true you did drugs?"

Ah, now he knows what this is about.

"Who told you? Oh wait—Shinra did, right?"

She nodded, "Yes. Now answer my question."

"Yes..I did heroin to be specific...but then I nearly died."

It was kind of hard to believe her ears, since Izaya did once tell her that he was going to stay clean from drugs. She wondered what happened to that.

"Why? Why did you do it?"

"Shiki told me it was supposed to relieve you. Somewhat it did, but it didn't last long so to make it last longer, I injected more and more until I just couldn't take it."

He sighed again,"Then he has the nerve to tell me to stop even though he was the one who introduced me to heroin. Funny right? Anyway, I did, just so I could keep my job."

She did think it was funny. That was like giving a tasty lollipop to a kid, but then telling them to give it back before they even got to finish it.

Since what at the doctor said was true, does that mean that Izaya did get-

No. There was no way, right?

There was only one way to find out; asking the man himself.

"Hey Izaya...Is it also true that you also got—that you also got raped?"

Izaya became tense.

"Raped? No. I didn't get raped." He said, his voice a bit shaky.

It was obvious Izaya was lying.

Sadly, it was true that Izaya had been raped.

She knew all he wanted to do was to forget and pretend it didn't happen. I mean who wouldn't just want to forget?

But in the end, it will all catch up to him. He couldn't just lie to himself his whole life.

So she had no other choice, but to tell him the truth. Even though she knew it'll break him.

"Izaya, you got raped."

——

Liar.

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