Dark Price of Paradise

I'd Rather Die

She went over to the clinic. Kane was at her usual place in the waiting room. There were ten islanders waiting. Teuila smiled at Kane and the islanders who were waiting in the room. Doctor Bao was in the examination room in the back. Teuila didn't see Daisy Chun.

"Where is Daisy?" Teuila saw Kane point to the infirmary.

Teuila went into the infirmary where Daisy had a bucket and rag, cleaning the dust off window seals and anything else she could think of. There was a broom and dusk pan. A mop bucket. Apparently Daisy was working hard. Hard and angry, similar to how Teuila sometimes work when she was upset or frustrated.

"Daisy?" Teuila saw Daisy's head snap up. She bared her teeth, then saw who it was. She huffed, looked down again.

"What's wrong?" Teuila was sure that Daisy was about to take her head off verbally. "Aren't you being treated well."

Daisy threw the rag into the bucket and turned to face Teuila. She forced herself to calm down. Sat on one of the infirmary beds. Biting her lower lip she tried to hold back her temper.

"Everything is wrong. Daisy not treated well at all." She grumbled.

"What is it? Is it Kane and Li, are they abusing you?" Teuila doubted it, but Daisy might perceive it that way. She had never had to do clean up work before.

"No. I see in their eyes, they don't approve of me. Only they no show it." Daisy kept reverting to what she called her 'cutsie accent'. Daisy usually spoke fair English when she chose to. "Nobody else believes Daisy can be anything but 'bitch in heat'."

"Who is that? Who called you a bitch in heat." Teuila wanted Daisy to succeed. To be more than a prostitute. Wanted to give Daisy that chance.

"Men who want Daisy. You know, the sex, not really want me. Women who are married to men who sleep with me. They think I want to take their men, I don't want worthless men who cheat on them. Only money."

Daisy took a breath. "I want to stop. No more men. Make my money this way. Do good things for people. Only they won't let me."

"It's not up to them." Teuila sat on the bed and put an arm around Teuila. "It's up to you. You have a chance to prove them wrong. I'll help you as much as I can."

"Why do you help me?" Daisy looked at Teuila tears falling from her eyes. "Why help?"

"Because I can. I am Queen of this island. That means I am responsible for every individual for this island. When you were brought here by Victor Thrayer, you became my responsibility as well."

"But, I'm an awful person. A used to use opium. When I'm feeling bad I want to use it again. Despite knowing I shouldn't, that using it is like a living death. Before I use opium again, I'd rather die. Sometimes I think it's better to just die."

Teuila was quiet. Daisy just sat there. She wondered if Daisy thought Teuila was shocked by this revelation. "I think about dying too."

Daisy's shocked look told Teuila she must never have thought that someone like Teuila would think about wanting to die. Teuila gave Daisy a tight hug then released her.

"Since I killed the little boy, I've been thinking about dying. Wanting to, because of the pain." Teuila told Daisy. "Your pain is different from mine, but we essentially are feeling the same thing. You are probably one of the only people on the island to really understand how I feel."