[Star Trek: Discovery] A Larger Picture (Un Disegno Più Grande-English Version-)

Ep. 2 "New Eden" (pt. 6)

~Grace~

I spent my life being guided by reason, but I realized that it was my prison. I did it because I had so many unresolved knots and I didn't want to dissolve them. Now I have decided, for once, to let myself be guided by instinct. I'm clear, I don't know what I would do to see you again.

The bell rings.
-Come in!
Howosekun enters from the door.
-Joann! How can I help you?
- I just want to know how you're doing...  after Terralisyum.
-I'm fine, thanks. I'm just very stressed.
- I know... but I feel that there is something that you don't want to tell me.
-Nothing Joann, really, I'm just a little bit down. A good night's sleep and everything will pass.
- All right... I'm here if you need.
Her gaze falls on the book on the table. -What are you reading?
-"The Subtle Harmony of the Opposites", by Nicola Bolaffi.
-Never heard.
-It's from an ancestor of mine, it's been a property of my family for decades. It's from the 21st century, and is little known. It was already at the time for a small audience. But it's very beautiful. I think... it can be an inspiration...
-Well, I'm going to leave you reading, good night!
-Goodnight Joann!

The girl goes away. Afterwards I take a shower and go to bed, they have been busy days. Better sleep on them.

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-How many Jacks we have drunk?
- I don't know Chris, but I'm a bit drunk. It's better to go aut of there!
We leave the mess hall and head towards the quarters. We come to his.
-Here we are...-, he says.
I get close to him and kiss him. He opens the cabin door and we enter in, without interrupting the contact. I don't remember the feeling of his hands on my back, of a firm touch, looking for the zip of my dress. Or of my nose invaded by the smell of alcohol, I don't even know where it comes from, perhaps from both. I don't remember the sound of his sighs, of mines, both of us short of breath, or the familiar noise of the engines. I would like to say that I remember how I end up on the wall, the cold touch of the tritanium bulkhead on my bare skin... I know I am lucid enough to be conscious, but drunk enough not to stop.
I would like to say that I remember how we end up without clothes, how I feel a chill from the air exchange of the house on my burning skin. I don't remember how I end up on the bed, how for a moment the smell of alcohol is replaced by that of clean sheets. Or how the noises around me vanish, and a silence surrounds me, I hear only the sound of his breath, the sounds of his kisses on my skin.
I can't remember the feeling of his hot breath on my bare stomach, or the tickling of his hair on my thighs.
I don't remember the feeling of warm contact when he's inside me. I don't remember the sounds of disconnected words interrupted by kisses.
I don't remember the same disconnected words that I say, which become syllables, and the same syllables that become letters, a thousand letters shattering into a single sound without rules.

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Notes:

Finally they managed to do something (at least in the flashbacks)!
I've never written red rating things, so sorry if the scene is a bit flat. The scene itself in my opinion is not so explicit, some future (few and maybe) will be slightly more explicit.
But it is up to your common sense to decide whether to go ahead or not, the history rating is for adults from the beginning.
For respect, I will always warn you first, even for things like this.

Anyway I put a quotation from "The subtle armony of opposites", by Nicola Bolaffi, a book that I love! (I highly recommend it to all of you readers, but I don't know if there is an English version...)

Sorry if I hadn't posted, but I'm very busy with school.
I hope you enjoyed it anyway!
Llap