Every Song Tells A Story (Montgomery De La Cruz Oneshots)

I think I'm OKAY - MGK (Montgomery POV)

A/N: This chapter is a little different than the rest. In this chapter, it's primarily focusing on Montgomery instead of focusing on a relationship. I hope y'all like it!

Watch me, take a good thing and fuck it all up in one night

Catch me, I'm the one on the run away from the headlights

No sleep, up all week wasting time with people I don't like

I think something's fucking wrong with me

I looked at the clock on the wall in Bryce's pool house.. five AM. I only have an hour and a half before I need to start getting ready for school. I rolled my eyes and chugged down the rest of the beer in my hand before crunching the can and tossing it across the room. Then I reached for the bong that was sitting on the table in front of me and immediately took a few big hits off of it. I looked around the room full of passed out guys. Bryce, Justin, Zach, Scott, Alex, and even Marcus. I rolled my eyes and slightly growled at just the sight of them. I really can't stand any of them but in order to maintain my spot in the social status, I've got to be friends with them. And if I want to keep my spot on the baseball and football team, I've definitely gotta stay friends with Bryce. That fucker controls everything so even though he repulses me, I have to pretend like he's my best friend. Just like with my dad, I have to try my hardest to pretend like I like him but at the end of the day.. it never works. He still beats my ass. There's only one person in this entire world that I genuinely like but I try my hardest not to bring her into my madness. Ella. I'm crazy about her but every time I do try to let her in and hope for the best, something happens and I fuck it all up. That's all I'm good at.. fucking everything up. I took another big hit from the bong before walking into the kitchen and grabbing the liquor from the night before. Who cares that I have to go to school in a couple of hours? If I've gotta deal with all the stupid fucks at that school, I might as well drown myself in alcohol and smoke more weed than my lungs can handle. It's not like I have any other choice at this point but to always be fucked up. That's the only way I can get through each day.

Drown myself in alcohol, that shit never helps at all

I might say some stupid things tonight when you pick up this call

I've been hearing silence on the other side for way too long

I can taste it on my tongue, I can tell that somethings wrong but

I guess it's my life and I can take it if I wanna

But I cannot hide in hills of California

Because these hills have eyes and I've got paranoia

I hurt myself sometimes, is that too scary for ya?

"El.. w-what are you d-doing?." I slurred into the phone. She didn't say anything, which both irritated and hurt me. "A-answer me." I slurred again in a slight tone. "You know I don't like to talk to you whenever you're like this, Mon." She spoke softly into the phone. "Oh, so that means y-you never w-wanna talk to me then, r-right?" I slurred, standing up from Bryce's couch abruptly and stumbling around the living room. All of the guys looked at me concerned and then looked at each other. This is what I always do so what the fuck does it matter to them? "What? Montgomery, come on. You know that's not what I meant..." "It is what you meant!" I yelled before stumbling backward and falling down onto the table, crashing through the glass. I laid there for a second, not moving a muscle as all of the guys stared at me shocked. "Monty?" I heard Ella say through the phone. "Mon, are you okay?" She spoke again, sounding more panicked this time. I suddenly busted out laughing, the alcohol making it seem so much funnier than it actually was. "Ah, shit. I b-broke the fucking t-table." I slurred through hysterical laughter. "Come on, man. Let's get you up." Bryce said before standing up and then grabbing my arm and pulling me up. I wasn't helping so Zach had to get up and pull on my other arm. Once I was finally up, I stumbled towards the kitchen while putting the phone back to my ear. "Y-you should've s-seen that shit, Ella." I slurred while chuckling. "I don't think it's funny, Montgomery. You could've really gotten hurt." She said. I rolled my eyes before looking down at my arm and noticing a huge gash that was pouring blood. I gently touched it and then busted out laughing again. "Elly.. I- fucked up m-my arm." I laughed while stumbling back and almost falling again until I hit the counter. "It's not funny, Monty. The way you're acting right now is embarrassing..." "Embarrassing? Embarrassing t-to w-who? You?" I snapped harshly, still heavily slurring my words. Before she could respond, I was already picking up the bottle of Whiskey and taking big gulps out of it. "Yes it's embarrassing to me, Montgomery. You and I are kind of a package deal..." "No the fuck w-we aren't." I interrupted her in a chuckle. I took another big gulp before speaking up again. "We're not t-together, Ella. I just f-fuck the shit out of y-you." I slurred. All of the guys whipped around in their seats and stared at me with wide eyes because they know, just like everyone does, that I do actually love Ella. This is what I always do though.. I fuck everything up with her and then after I've sobered up and done some major damage control, she comes back around. Not that I deserve it. "Not anymore." Ella whispered quietly before hanging up the phone without another word. "Ella!" I yelled into the phone, just to hear silence." "El.." I pleaded this time, tears welling up in my eyes now. Once I still heard silence, I viciously growled before throwing my phone at the wall as hard as I could, causing it to immediately shatter. I let out an animalistic yell before storming towards the guys and grabbing the bag of cocaine off of one of the side tables. "Mon, I don't think..." "Shut the f-fuck up." I snapped at Zach, causing him to immediately shut up. I quickly did a line off of the table before grabbing Bryce's phone and attempting to call Ella. She kept ignoring the calls because she knew good and well that it was me. "Fuck you too then!" I yelled before throwing Bryce's phone and then storming outside, the bottle of whiskey still in my hand this whole time. I quickly chugged the rest of it down before throwing the bottle as hard as I could, causing it to shatter on the concrete. I stared at the pool silently and felt hot tears making their way down my face. I hate my life. I hate everyone but Ella and I'm constantly making her hate me because of all the deep seeded issues that I have. I could end it all right now. I could stop all of this pain. I harshly wiped my eyes and let out one more sob before throwing myself into the pool without a second thought. I let myself sink to the bottom and I had no intentions of coming back up. As soon as everything started to go black, I saw Ella's face. As soon as I found it in myself to come back up, I did. I coughed water up and gasped for breath for a minute before going back to normal. I allowed myself to float on my back on the surface. I stayed that way for the rest of the night. Not only thinking about how much I hate my life, but also thinking about how much I hate myself.