October Soulmates

Chapter 14: Do You Love Him?

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"Every time I think of you, I have to remind myself that if you wanted to talk to me, you would."
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October 28, 2018
2:34 am

Alex's POV

I stared at the ceiling, tracing my fingers through the air. I couldn't stop thinking about everything that's happened this month.

That made me think of when I first met Thomas. He was tall, thin, but still in good shape. He was also rather timid, and he's always strived to please people. Even so, if he doesn't please them then he goes out of his way to at least meet with them halfway.

I pondered a little longer, turning my head slightly to see John laying beside me. And suddenly George's question floated into my mind.

"Do you love him?"

I immediately thought of John...but why? If you'd asked me the same question 13 years ago I would have said I loved someone else.

I would have thought of Thomas first. Not just because I thought he was attractive. Although that was a bonus. He's always been there for me, and even when he wasn't he always stayed in my headspace, I tried to better myself for him.

I looked back at the ceiling and then back at John. What made me better when I was with him?

People used to say we were polar opposites, that we somehow fit perfectly despite being opposites. I think back and I don't see perfection at all. I see John, and I see him and I arguing when no one was watching. He wanted me to stop working, he wanted us to be together more often.

But I remember being sort of relieved after we broke up. It was just hidden well by the feelings of misery. I wanted him to dictate my life because I was so used to it.

Perhaps...it's about time I try to find someone who wants to equally dictate my life. Someone who wants me to love them but doesn't want our love to be faked. Someone who doesn't want to use me.

Ha, perhaps it's only wishful thinking...

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Lafayette told me that he was originally going to have the party today on the 28th. Which was oddly John's birthday by coincidence or on purpose.

I assumed it was on purpose due to the break in. But then Lafayette decided to host it tomorrow to give Hercules and Lafayette time to prepare. They were also probably checking the house to make sure it wasn't booby trapped by a certain prankster.

"So the party's on the 30th?" John asked, rubbing.

"Yeah, you can go back to sleep." I said , "I'll only be a minute."

I walked out into the kitchen to get my phone. Peggy texted me Thomas' number. I added the contact back onto my phone and I was going to text him when I realized something.

If Thomas really wanted to talk to me...he would have tried to contact me.

Does that mean that he was that unknown number?

I checked and they were both the same number. I stared at my phone for a long time. I don't think I'll do it today on his birthday.