(DISCONTINUED) I Remember When I Lost My Mind {*~Thomas Jeff. x Reader~*} Modern

Remembering is hard...

Thomas' POV

I can't wrap my head around that and I don't know why. I pulled my knees to my chest and hug them, feeling my chest compress as I duck in a breath. It has to be normal. It always happens, so it's normal. She doesn't know what she's talking about.

It seems like no one does.

I shake my head and snap out of my thoughts. I pulled myself to my feet, grab the dog plushie Y/N gave me a while back. He drew a hand through my wild curls and looked out the barred-window in my room. Technically it's a cell, but hey, it's home and I'm not complaining. I wonder what's it's like to be free?

It's an odd thought. But it's something that I've been thinking abut ever since Y/N showed up. She seems so optimistic. I don't know what that's like; probably never will. I take a deep breath and set the small plush on the ledge of the barred-window. They have bars outside the windows here so you can't try to escape.

I turned my attention to the wall and notice all the tallies I've drawn on it. I squint at it a bit, it's almost as if I can't tell anymore. I know I've been here for a long time. In fact, I don't know the time or what day it is. I gave up on keeping track a long time ago, so that wall of tallies isn't as accurate as it might seem. Quite honestly, it's probably years behind.

Shrugging my shoulders, I head over to the slab of a bed I've got inside my room, and flop onto it lazily. I gave a small wince at the jolt of pain I felt from how rough the bed is, and force myself to get comfortable.... It's hard to get comfortable on this thing though. Okay, I try to get into a bearable position.

Then I do what I do everyday.

Stare at the ceiling and imagine a life I'll never have.

—

A/N: I'm sorry it's short. But I got something out and I'm proud.