Allegiant: Is This The End?

Chapter 5

Tobias

I feel better; things are finally falling in places.

 As we head to our room, I ask Tris, ‘What are we going to do once all of this is over?’

Tris says, ‘I don’t have the faintest idea. What do you think we should do?’

‘Would you like to move in with me, like have a place of our own?’

 ‘That’s not a bad idea. I have no family left. I cannot even call Caleb my brother, what he has done was just so … I don’t even have words to describe how I feel?’

 ‘Shush… I understand’, I say as I tuck a loose strand of hair behind her ear. I trace her jaw line with my nose and move it towards her lips. I kiss slowly at first, slowly deepening it. My arms are around her waist and her hands are in my hair. She pulls away and laughs.

 ‘I love you Tris’, I say.

‘I love you too Tobias’ and she kisses me.

We both have been through a lot. We need some peace in our life, I don’t want to spend my entire life running away, it’s like running into trouble instead running away from it. Trouble finds us some way or the other. But running away with Tris is another thing all together.

I finally pull over, hesitantly. She pouts and I laugh.

‘Didn’t I tell you that you are adorable?’

 She smiles and says, ‘You told me right now.’

 ‘Promise me, you won’t leave me, ever. No matter what happens. My life will be miserable without you. I don’t want to lose you’, the last part almost becomes a whisper.

 ‘Promise, I won’t leave you ever. Promise me you won’t leave me, too. I can’t imagine my life without you.’

‘I promise’

Tris says, ‘Tobias, I was thinking this for a while now. You might think I am crazy and I don’t even know if it’s possible or not but still. See, if the bureau can make a memory serum virus that can spread in the experiment. Can’t we try and make another serum that can do the opposite, like you know in a way inoculate them, the way this memory serum can spread, the same way. The only thing is that they will remain immune to the memory serum forever but obviously taking away someone’s memory is also not a very good idea.’

There is a brief moment of silence and it is kind of awkward.

She says, ‘What do you think? Tell me…’

I cut her off ‘This is an amazing idea Tris. Though it does have side effects but still, let’s see if this is even possible also or not, we have to go right now, even though we have time but the sooner, the better.’

‘Do you think we should go together? I don’t think David will like me being with you guys all the time. I think if I want to be on a good, trustable position then I have to maintain as much distance as possible. Sorry. I don’t wanna hurt you but it will be better this way. Trust me. I am sorry.’

Then she leaves without any words and I realize why she said so because I am a GD that’s why she is not taking me along with her.

I curse Marcus for this. Out of all good things Marcus had was being a GP. The only thing that was good about him. I didn’t get it. I don’t know what Evelyn saw in him. What was so good in him that she married him? If Marcus hadn’t told Tris about this, none of it would have happened except all our memories would have been erased. Maybe Tris’s memory wouldn’t.

Life is so mysterious, at one moment it so pleasant and nice and then suddenly there is nothing, just nothing. No matter what you do, it remains miserable until you see some hope, some light in the darkness and things get better and better, and the cycle repeats again.

I don’t even know when we will stop running from these miserable troubles, when for once we won’t have to worry about anything, when the Sun will start shining as the clouds of darkness part way for it. I don’t like the way life is. We have lost so many people so far. Marlene, Lynn, Will, Al, Tris’s parents, Tori, Edward. The ironic part is the one who are and were creating problems for us stayed longer than others, the ones who have died. Eric, Jeanine, Peter and Marcus are a few to name. Life is weird. Right now, in this situation, a person is there for a moment and then just gone in another. I am so happy Tris isn’t one of them, she is here with me in this place we call Earth.

I didn’t even realize how long I must have been this way because I feel someone touch my shoulder and say ‘Are you alright?’

I can recognize this voice from anywhere. It is Tris.

‘Yeah, I am alright. Just wandered off, in my thoughts’

‘Would you like to tell me what was it?’

‘Nothing serious, just thinking about life in general.’

‘Oh’

‘What about you, what did Matthew say?’

‘Well according to him…’

And she tells me all.