Secluded

Chapter 11

TRIGGER WARNING.

That hate I'm getting is overwhelming and as I sit on the bathroom floor on the bus at 2am and my phone keeps giving me comments about killing myself. They tell me to slit my wrists deep. I don't like disappointing people, I think as I play with the peace of shiny metal in my fingertips.

"Long time no see." I whisper, gliding the magic across my skin, pushing it down as the blood seeks from my body. I don't feel any pain, because the pain of living hurts more. I don't know if I'm doing this to die, that's what they want to happen. Maybe now they'll realise that shit they say hurts. Maybe I'll die. I don't know.

I'm lying on the bathroom floor with blood surrounding me, I can hear people shouting, telling me to open the door. I stare at the door as it falls open and a body rushes in.

Michael.

He stares at me, worry written across his face, I smile weakly at him.

"Don't worry Mikey... This is what they wanted..." I whisper.

"Stand up Alexis... Cmon stand up.." He stutters, running his hands through his hair. I put my face in my hands and sob.

"I don't want to die... But it's what they want." I mumble, and I strong pair of arms hold me. He carefully lifts me up, and my limp body flops in his grip.

"Calum! Luke! Guys help me!" He shouts running out the bathroom, they come.

"Oh my god what happened!?" Luke shouts, rubbing his eyes, he stands there in his penguin boxers not knowing what to do.

"Call an ambulance." Michael says, looking down at me. My eye lids feel droopy. "Keep your eyes open for me love." He says, gently stroking my hair. "Why did you do this?" He whispers.

"They told me to..." I mumble.

"You're gonna be okay. I'm not going to let you die, you need to stay awake okay?" He says, his breath quick.

"What's going on!?" Calum and Ashton shout simultaneously running into the lounge. Ashton's in a monkey onesie and I giggle slightly.

"Hey love." He smiles, and kisses my forehead. "You're gonna be okay."

The last thing I hear is the sound of sirens. It's like music to my ears.

-----------Michael P.O.V------------

They take her from my shaking body and lay her on a stretcher. I watch as they wheel her into the ambulance.

"She's allowed one passenger. Who will it be?" Says the paramedic, crossing the fingers and looking at us.

"Me." I say, stepping forward quickly. Not listening to the others protests I climb into the vehicle and sit next to her beautiful limp body.

Guilt consumes me as I watch her. This is all my fault, I think, I caused this.

I sit by her hospital bed, watching her every breath, holding her soft hand in mine.

She's so beautiful, I didn't mean for this to happen. I would do anything to have her back in my arms, even if it's just for a day. I hurt her, and I was a dick to her, and she deserves so much better. But I love her. I love her a lot.

Have you ever just looked at someone and thought, my fucking God. I adore you. I adore every goddamn ounce. I adore your bones and your soul. But I'm a loser who just doesn't want to lose you. I can lose fucking everything everything but not you. Oh god. Not you.

Her nurse walks in and walks round the side of her bed.

"Sir, I'm afraid you must wait in the waiting room."