Destiel Oneshots - [Mostly Wing!Kink]

Rain Water

HEY S14 SPOILERS, FOR THE LAST EPISODE

Just go scroll all the way down for notes

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Castiel felt like crying. He felt like he needed to sob. But he couldn't. Angels don't cry. There has been never been an Angel in the entire existence of everything who cried before. And yet there was Castiel, feeling his throat tighten until he couldn't breathe. He shouldn't feel like this. He never felt like this before. It was a terrible feeling. But he knew that the two Winchester's felt this many times. More than Castiel could remember. But anyways, he knew words could hurt. But the Angel never imagined that Dean's words would hurt this much.

"I told you a few months ago. If something happened to her, you'd be dead to me. Don't think I didn't forget about that. You're dead to me, Cas! I don't want to see your face ever again. Leave and don't come back. I don't care if you 'held me tight and raised me perdition' or if we 'have a more perfound bond.' I DON'T GIVE A SHIT! GO AND DON'T LOOK BACK. I HATE YOU, CASTIEL! I HATE YOU!"

Castiel felt him clutching his own arms tightly. Hard enough that it was hurting himself. Good.

"If you wanted me to leave, you could've just said so."

Castiel remembered saying to him, and then walked away without expecting Dean to talk to him while he left. He thought that he'd be fine. He thought that it would just be simple, continuing on hunting but just far from where Dean was. But it wasn't what he thought. Usually, it was Sam who found the cases and sent him off. Castiel had no idea how to find cases, or use a computer. Or anything electronic. So instead he spent his time going around country to country trying to see if there was something that involved hunting. It wasn't easy.

Castiel was now in a shady motel, getting the room was simple. He only got it because he was sick of driving everywhere in that stupid truck. While he walked in, he started to think remember why he was there in the first place. He got depressed and raged. But miserable. He ended up breaking everything, throwing things around in pure outrage. Hours passed, and Castiel found himself in the corner of the room with a broken lamp the only illumination. He had a bottle of alcohol next to him, that was halfway done, and there was blood stained on his coat. His blood to be exact. It was drawn from the broken glass that was shattered, and the reckless actions that he had done. He thought he deserved to be hurt. He knew he deserved it with all he's done.

The fight from before. It was originally just a normal conversation, until Dean said something about the deal he made with the Empty. Apparently, Chuck told him when he was alone once. Castiel didn't know how to reply, so he lied. He said that Chuck was lying. Writers always lie, like Chuck said himself. Dean believed him, but then an argument developed from that.

"I'm sorry Mar-... Your-... She was killed. I should've-... I'm sorry."

And that outraged Dean. He became protective about it. And that's how the fought. Cas deeply regretted saying that. It got him to this goddamn motel, on the edge of breaking. Castiel screamed at himself, telling himself that he couldn't cry for this. It didn't hurt. It wasn't painful. He'd be okay. He'd be fine.

It was all lies.

'I shouldn't be here.'

Castiel thought.

'I can't live a life without them. What would I be worth if the Winchesters despise me.'

And at the end of that thought, footsteps were heard. Inside of the room, not outside. The Angel struggled to get his blade, which was thrown on the other side of him and the top was covered in his blood. Self harm. It was hard to grab it. He was very intoxicated. But once he got to it, he felt hands grab him and force him up pinning him to the wall behind him. He was face to face with an unfamiliar person, but there was something familiar by the sense and look in her eye.