IF ONLY.....

chapter 1

You know, some people  wish they  could  just disappear from the face of earth  cause everything  just tends to get  too much sometimes. One mistake, just one and then boom someone's  life over. Well  her name is Marang  Ndlovu and she’s  22 years of age, she was born and bred in a place called  Pretoria in South Africa. She’s Sarah Ndlovu and the late  Jonas Mokone ‘s daughter. Well speaking about her  father Jonas, the thing is he was  married and had an affair with her  mother and she’s the product of that affair. Her being the product of an affair brought nothing but anguish in her life because her  “supposed “ father never cared  for her  existence up until death visited him, all he did was send maintenance money and never not even once visited her or asked to see her even for 5 minutes or let alone to call so he can talk to her. As for her  mother she despises her  and always reminds her that she’s an abomination and she  blames her  for her unhappy life and sufferings. She says if she  wasn't conceived Jonas would still be alive and taking care of her but no she had to be born and now people label her as a whore and a home wrecker because of her.

It  hurts her deeply to be labeled as a bastard and a daughter of a whore as if she  asked to be born into all that  mess but she always tells herself that God has a great plan for her cause he wouldn't let her live even after her mother tried to abort her . Despite all the emotional abuse and anguish Marang get from her mother, she made sure she goes  to school and now she’s  doing her  second year at University.

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Now she’s at some club in Midrand with her friend Dineo and It's her first time there, even though clubs, taverns, pubs and so on it's not her cup of tea but she decided to tag along with Dineo just to clear her head. Three weeks ago she found out that her boyfriend Mazwi (now ex) slept with some girl on campus and that girl fell pregnant.

He said to her  it was a mistake blah blah blah but you know what, she  didn't  care about his stupid excuses cause she's broken and hurt.  this whole thing hit her  so hard that she  even  attempted to commit suicide. She  trusted him and gave him her love  and her pride  (virginity) and he just broke her just  like that. Anyway enough about him and back to her  going to a club with her crazy  friend Dineo, well her friend whispers to her that there's some handsome guy checking her out behind her and Marang turns to look only to be met by  this handsome tall, muscled dark man and  She's immediately  taken by his handsomeness. She quickly turns back when he smirks at her and her eyes pops out as she looks at Dineo who's amused by her reaction. She can't believe a guy as breath taking as he is, is actually checking her out. The guy is  well build and just yummy even though  he looks a bit older like in his mid or late 30s but she doesn't care, she just wants to let loose and have fun and forget about her cheating ex-boyfriend, mind you Mazwi was her first boyfriend and her virgin- breaker so she isn't that  experienced in the relationship  and bedroom department. Anyway the guy keeps on staring at her for some time until he decides to come to her. He whispers in her  ear that he wants her so bad and that they should go upstairs and have some fun. Even though Marang  want to tell  him to fuck off but something in her shut her up and she just finds herself lusting over him and plus she is tipsy and his very  deep  voice whispering in her  ear made her feel things down there. The truth is she has  always been a good girl I mean she even lost her  virginity in varsity but at this moment she  just wants to let loose and just have that guy fuck her brains out .

Even though she's never done this before she  stands up and goes with him to some office upstairs after she  told her friend Dineo  that she'll  be back and Dineo   said she  should enjoy and forget about her troubles . They  get in that office and as soon as they  enter that office he just  holds her from behind and makes her bend down and immediately  she feels her short dress being pulled up and her  thong being pushed to the side and she  sees a condom wrapper falling to the floor. Right now she  knows she's gonna be fucked like a prostitute.