IF ONLY.....

CHAPTER 37

THURSDAY


Two days later Kgosi hasn’t said anything to Dineo and now it’s getting to her, he doesn’t tell her when he leaves anymore and he doesn’t even ask about the baby if she’s ok or not, nigga doesn’t even eat with her anymore....last night she kept awake thinking hard and she realized that she went too far.....Anyway she walked to the kitchen hungry as hell and she stopped on her tracks when she found Kgosi making himself a peanut butter and jam sandwich, she swallowed hard and cleared her throat.
Dineo: hi
She said with a low tone.
Kgosi: mmmmh
He said not even looking at her and it stung a bit.
Dineo: ummm about what I did.... I m sorry Kgosi
He didn’t say anything.
Dineo: I lied I didn’t use it on my ass.....i was just mad and I said that
Still nothing.
Dineo: I know I can act crazy sometimes but I didn’t mean to disrespect you I was just angry
Kgosi: so what am I supposed to say now that you said all that nonsense?
She frowned.
Kgosi: I don’t have time for your shit Dineo.....take that stupid apology and shove it down your fucken ass cause it won’t erase what you did
He switched on the kettle again as Dineo stood there shocked and hurt by his response.
Kgosi: you’re fucken disrespectful and I wonder how disrespectful you were to Tirelo nxa
Dineo: don’t bring Richard into this!
He turned and looked at her.
Kgosi: I see you think this fucken world revolves around you huh....you think you’re all that just because you’re carrying a multimillionaire child
Dineo chuckled bitterly.
Kgosi: well guess what little girl without that child you’re nothing...a fucken nobody!
That hit her hard and tears filled her eyes and she started breathing fast.
Kgosi: without that child all you are known as is a fucken home wreaker with daddy issues so check yourself little girl next time you wanna try that shit with me....i can fucken end you like that for disrespecting me like that
He spit venom and he snapped his fingers.
Kgosi: the only reason you’re still breathing for the shit you just did is because of that child so know your fucken place and stay there!
He said with the coldest tone ever and Dineo quickly turned and rushed away as tears ran down her cheeks, she didn’t want him to see her crying......his words cut deep.
Kgosi: nx
He said and  clenched his jaws trying to calm himself down....he finished making his coffee and went to sit down and eat....he was still angry with what Dineo did and the disrespect he felt and still feeling even now is just too much for him to just let it go just like this.


THREE HOURS LATER


Kgosi left the house and that’s when Dineo left her bedroom to go make herself something to eat, Kgosi’s words still rang in her head and they were getting to her.....   She couldn’t believe he said all that to her.
Dineo: mxm
She wiped her tears off and made herself a cup of tea.

TWO HOURS LATER

She was sitting at the back porch watching Mr Kabongo busy on the garden he started....he was watering the plants while humming a song....she smiled a bit looking at him then her smile faded and tears filled her eyes, she wondered how it feels like to have a father....how to be disciplined and also protected by him and not to mention the love....she wondered how it feels like to call someone papa or daddy.....Tears ran down her cheeks, she covered her face crying....all the pain of not knowing her father that she managed to suppress all these years came pouring down on her like a volcano....she cried until she felt a hand on her shoulder, she opened her eyes and it was Mr Kabongo, he sat down next to her and pulled her to his chest and she let it all out.....After some time she calmed down and Mr Kabongo went to get her a glass of water mixed with sugar and she drank it.
Dineo: thank you
Kabongo: who hurt you my daughter?
He asked with his unique accent and Dineo looked down sniffing.
Kabongo: tell me who hurt you and I’ll deal with him
Dineo giggled when he made punching gestures.
Kabongo: I still have it in me to punch someone’s face so tell so I’ll go deal with them
Dineo: I had a fight with Kgosi and he said some hurtful things to me
She sniffed.
Kabongo: what was the fight about if you don’t mind me asking
She sighed.
Dineo: i...i did something stupid and also lied.....i know he felt disgusted and disrespected but he shouldn’t have said what he said
Her eyes got filled with tears again.
Dineo: he called me a nobody pa....he said without this baby im carrying im a home wreaker and a nobody with daddy issues
She cried a painful cry and Mr Kabongo sighed and he comforted her.
Kabongo: I take it what you did to him bruised his ego
She nodded still crying.
Kabongo: but that doesn’t mean he should say things like that to you
He patted her back gently as she cried.
Kabongo: shhh stop crying my child you’ll end up upsetting my grandchild
After some time Dineo calmed down and she wiped her face and Mr Kabongo sighed.
Kabongo: there’s something you need to know about Kgosi.....when he’s angry he becomes something unspeakable..... and remember he’s royalty so they are taught certain things and certain things are instilled in them since childhood.... people back at the kingdom respect him and its worse cause he’s the next in line to be crowned King so im sure what you did didn’t just bruise his ego but disrespected him and his position as the heir to the throne
Dineo looked down.
Kabongo: I don’t know what you did to him but for him to hurt you with words like that might have been big.....im sure he felt disrespected
He sighed.
Kabongo: look here my daughter I know you feel like he should act like a prince in his kingdom and not here but it doesn’t work like that....i found out that his kingdom is also recognized by other kingdoms in and around the country to as far as Egypt and even the government recognize and respect it....did you see how everything is in that Kingdom, each and every household has a five room house built by the kingdom, there are tar roads everywhere and lights on the streets.....every house hold has running tap water and there are schools a clinic and many other things in that kingdom and I heard they are about to build a hospital too that’s how advanced they are.....the moment you enter that kingdom it’s like you’re in a different place all together compared to other neighboring places....i have been here for a short period of time but I can tell how powerful they are
Dineo sighed.
Kabongo: they didn’t wake up one day and decided to rule...those people are well respected all over and they care for their people
Dineo: I hear you pa
Kabongo: so in everything you do my child never forget who Kgosi is because besides being a prince he’s also dangerous when he’s angry ok
She nodded.

----------

Dineo just spoke with Marang about tomorrow which is a Friday, they were going to Marang’s home to sleep there cause on Saturday it was lobola( dowry) negotiation day...Marang wasn’t looking forward to it but she knew she has to go.....Dineo didn’t tell Marang about her argument or fight with Kgosi cause she had her own things that are stressing her, talking  to Mr Kabongo help a bit but she was still hurt by Kgosi’s words and how cold he was towards her.....Anyway they finished talking and her phone rang again and she answered.
Dineo: hello
Collins: im still waiting for an answer Dineo
She sighed and rolled her eyes.
Dineo: hi Collins
Collins: why are you doing this to me Dee
He asked with a pained tone.
Dineo: what are you talking about now?
Collins: you know I love you Dee and I’ll do anything for you but you treat me like shit and you disregard my feelings
She sighed.
Dineo: that’s not what im doing Collins, im just going through a lot
She said with a low tone, she was still heart broken by Kgosi’s words.....She never cares when people insult her or call her names but what Kgosi said and how he said it to her reached her already cracking heart and shattered it to pieces.
Collins: I just wanna be there for you Dee, for now I’ll settle for friendship until you heal....i just wanna be there that’s all
She sighed.
Dineo: hai Collins nna I don’t know what to say nou
Collins: lets met up for lunch tomorrow so we can talk properly please
Dineo: Collins i....
Collins: please Dee I need to see you
He interrupted her, then Kgosi’s call came through....she looked at her screen and rolled her eyes.
Dineo: fine lunch tomorrow is ok I guess
Collins: shit....thank you my beautiful queen you won’t regret it I promise you
He said with an excited tone.
Dineo: I hope so and its lunch as friends Collins, I don’t wanna be called a home wrecker again
She said the last part with a low tone.
Collins: don’t worry Cleo and I are getting divorced so relax and plus we’re friends right?
She rolled her eyes.
Dineo: you know what let’s rather do breakfast cause I just remembered that I have somewhere to be let’s say around 10 or 11 in the morning
She wanted to get over and done with cause she knows the whole meeting up thing with him will be about how much he loves her.
Collins: even 7 in the morning will do for me as long as I get to see your beautiful face
He said with a charming voice and she chuckled a bit shaking her head.
Dineo: ummm I gotta go friend... go shap ( bye)
Collins laughed.
Collins: friend neh
Dineo: yep...shap
Collins: bye beautiful
They ended the call and Dineo switched her phone off cause Kgosi didn’t stop calling her.....on the other side Collins was busy dancing in his office looking happy.
Collins: finally now things are coming together....ooh my Dee
He smiled then he sat down and dialed a number.
Voice: hello
Collins: do it tomorrow in the afternoon, she goes to church around six in the afternoon and comes back home around 8
Voice: go it!
Collins: make it look legit man I don’t want this shit coming back to me
Voice: I’ve done this many times with 100% success rate so relax
Collins: good..... you’ll get the rest of your money after the job is done and I’ll add an extra something if no suspicions arise
Voice: now were talking..... consider it done.....shap shap
Collins: shap
He dropped the call and deleted the number then he sat back and smiled picturing his date tomorrow with Dineo.


----------


Kgosi walked inside his house not looking pleased at all, he found Mr Kabongo drinking his tea while watching Tv.....He greeted him and as he was about to climb the stairs Mr Kabongo called him, Kgosi went to sit next to him but he was anxious to go upstairs.
Kgosi: is everything ok
Mr Kabongo shook his head.
Kabongo: im disappointed in you my son
He said with a disappointed voice and Kgosi frowned.
Kabongo: whatever she did to you does not amount to what you said to her, worst part while she’s pregnant
Kgosi cleared his throat.
Kabongo: you said she’s the chosen one for you by your ancestors but you’re pushing her to hate you.....trust me my son you don’t want to be married to a woman that despises you....you do not want that
Kgosi sighed.
Kabongo: there are many ways to punish the one you love and you telling her she’s a nobody with daddy issues is not one of them unless you lied to me about your feelings towards her
Kgosi: I just lost it dad i....
Mr Kabongo raised his hand to stop him from talking.
Kabongo: you lose it out there Kgosi but not here.....you can be a monster all you want out there but not here especially towards her!
He said with a reprimanding voice and Kgosi looked down clenching his jaws.
Kabongo: im really disappointed with you son im not going to lie......you need to fix things cause if that girl loses that baby because of stress it will be your fault....you know she doesn’t know her father and you still said all that to her....you know she’s not royalty or from a rich family and you still called her a nobody..... just because you’re royalty doesn’t mean you should look down on other people cause royalty or not we are all gonna die and be buried and our body will all rot and gets eaten by maggots
Kgosi: dad i...
Kabongo: don’t interrupt me when im talking boy!
Kgosi kept quiet and he clenched his jaws looking down while he played with his royal ring on his pinky finger.
Kabongo: you will not be one of those men who abuse their wives whether physically, mentally or spiritually or any other way you hear me....now go and apologize for your hurtful words before you make me angry!
Kgosi: you don’t even want to know what she did
He said with a harsh tone.
Kabongo: I said don’t make me angry boy.....now go upstairs and fix things before I punch all teeth out!
Kgosi sighed shaking his head and got up then he went upstairs...it wasn’t the first time he was scolded by Mr Kabongo and he was sure it wasn’t the last time...he always called him out on his bullshit and the fact that he did now even though he knows that he’s of royal blood makes him appreciate him even more cause back at the kingdom people are too scared to reprimand him when he’s done wrong things including his parents and uncles, they would just tell him to not do it again and leave it like that but not Mr Kabongo.....

He knocked on her door a couple of times  until the door opened, his face softened when he saw her swollen eyes....he swallowed hard feeling like shit now.
Dineo: can I help you
He cleared his throat.
Kgosi: im sorry
Dineo: askies?
Kgosi: im sorry about my harsh words.....i was angry and shit happened
He’s not one to apologize when he’s wrong unless he’s forced to and now was one of those times he’s forced to apologize.....he hated it to the core but here he was standing before Dineo who made him eat a cucumber she used to service herself with apologizing and guess what she just gave him a bored look.
Dineo: is that all?
He frowned.
Kgosi: yeah
Dineo: ok
Kgosi: so we good?
Dineo: no
Kgosi: bathong.....I just apologized Dineo....do you know how fucken hard that was
Dineo: and I heard you but its my choice to forgive or not unless you want to insult me for not forgiving you
He looked at her like she’s crazy.
Kgosi: you’re serious?
Dineo: no offense but do I look like im laughing or joking around
Kgosi chuckled getting pissed.
Kgosi: you know what its fine.....now I want to know what business you’re doing talking to that son of a bitch Collins
She frowned.
Dineo: how do you....
He interrupted her.
Kgosi: it doesn’t matter all I want to know is what the hell Dineo!
Dineo: who I talk to is none of your business Kgosi
Kgosi: it is my business if that mother fucker is a suspect in my brother’s death!
Dineo froze with her eyes popped out.
Dineo: wh....what?
Kgosi: stay away from that man Dineo, he might be after that baby you’re carrying to eliminate anything that belongs to Tirelo so he can have you all to himself....if you ever loved Tirelo you’ll stay away from that bastard
She just stood there frozen looking at him then her mind went to her conversation with Marang warning her to stay away from Collins and tears filled in her eyes with her bottom lip trembling.

----------

THE FOLLOWING DAY ( FRIDAY)

Dineo’s phone was off and it was driving Collins crazy, he was losing his mind cause it was now around 1 in the afternoon and he still couldn’t get through to her....He’s now even contemplating on whether to go to her new address or not, he didn’t want to seem desperate or obsessed but in actual fact he was....He sighed and took a large sip of his drink, put the glass down and he paid for his drinks, got up and he walked out.

----------

Kgosi went to check who was at the gate when the intercom went off.
Kgosi: who is it?
Collins frowned cause he didn’t expect a man to answer the intercom.
Collins: ummm this is Collins im here for Dineo
Kgosi felt extreme anger take over his body.
Kgosi: what did you say your name is again?
Collins: Collins im here for Dineo
He said with an annoyed voice and Kgosi chuckled.
Kgosi: yah neh you have the nerve I’ll give you that.....after killing Richard you still have the rotten balls to come and look for his woman who’s pregnant with his child!
Collins froze for a bit.
Collins: who...who’s this....where is Dineo?
Kgosi: tsamaya o mo lebelela ka motase ga onoroko ya mmaago mosono! ( go and look for her under your mother’s skirt you cunt!).....you have less than a minute to get the fuck away from my gate or mmaago o tile go utwa ka stichi sa kgale sa gae sa lebadi la operation  se kgaoga jou muur!....fokofa mo gating ya me jou fokon bastard! ( or your mother will feel the stitch from her old operation wound tear you bastard..... fuck off from my gate you fucken bastard!)
He said with an angry voice.
Kgosi: I better not find you there when I come out nxa!
He dropped the intercom door-phone slamming it hard and he clicked his tongue then he went upstairs and came back down with his loaded gun on his hand and he went out.....as soon as Collins saw Kgosi with a gun on his hand coming out of the house he quickly got inside his car and started it then he drove away in total speed and Kgosi clicked his tongue.....he went back inside after putting his gun safely on his back.
Kgosi: hi
He said to Dineo who was coming down with a small traveling bag clearly ready to leave to Marang’s home town.
Dineo: hi...ummm im ready to go
Kgosi: isn’t it  too early to leave?
Dineo: we wanna make sure the house is clean cause Marang’s mother ke mmadichilana nyana ( she’s untidy) and plus we wanna pass by the supermarket to buy things for tomorrow
He nodded and sighed....last night he stayed up all night feeling like shit with how he told Dineo about Richard possibly being killed by Collins and the hurtful words he said to her earlier before.....he realized the stress she’s going through which is not good for the baby and now he’s worried and feeling guilty cause if anything happens to Gauta he will never forgive himself....He cleared his throat.
Kgosi: im sorry Mmabontle....i fucked up I know
Dineo: its ok Prince Kgosi but just so you know, you apologizing won’t take back what you said to me or erase it from my mind....you and I live together because of Gauta so bear with me until I give birth so I’ll get out of your hair assomblief
He frowned.
Kgosi: Look i...
She interrupted him.
Dineo: with all due respect Prince Kgosi I don’t wanna discuss this any further all I ask is we respect each other’s privacy and never cross each other’s forbidden boundaries again
Kgosi clenched his jaws a bit looking at her.
Dineo: please my prince
She pleaded with him.
Kgosi: you don’t have to call me that
Dineo: you are a prince and I’ll prefer it if you call me Dineo and not Mmabontle please
He sighed looking down a bit shaking his head then back at her again.
Kgosi: is that what you want
Dineo: yes
Kgosi: ok and I hope one day you forgive me for the hurtful words I said to you
Dineo: someday maybe but not now
He nodded then he picked her bag and went towards the door with it with his mind all over.....he didn’t think things will turn out this way.

----------


ON THEIR WAY

Dineo: le setse le tlogile? ( have you guys left already)
Marang: yeah and ra fitlha e sekgale but Cole a re ro fitlhela ko BnB e baileng go robala ko yona pele ( yeah and we are almost there but Cole said we will first go to the BnB they’ll sleep at first)
Dineo: ok and don’t stress akere....o nale Jet Lee by your side so sa wara....mamagao ko mmetha ka di crouching tiger and drunken master kung fu a tsena mo laineng ( you have Jet Lee by your side so don’t worry....i’ll beat your mother with crouching tiger and drunken master kung fu and she’ll stay in line)
Marang laughed out loud over the phone and Kgosi chuckled shaking his head.
Marang: kao tshepa skeem ( I trust you my friend)
They both laughed.
Dineo: ok I’ll see you ge re fitlha ok ( when we arrive ok)
Marang: ok my person....kao rata wautlwa (I love you)
Dineo: o rata ke nna my person ( you’re loved by me my person)
Then they dropped the call and Kgosi looked at her for a bit then back on the road.
Kgosi: you two are pretty close neh
Dineo: mmmmh
She said busy on her phone.
Kgosi: how long have you two been friends?
Dineo: a long time...ummm Prince Kgosi not to sound rude neh but can we stop with all these small talks they are making me uncomfortable
Kgosi looked at her for a bit surprised and shocked at the same time then he frowned looking back at the road.
Kgosi: ok im...sorry for making you uncomfortable
She nodded then she went back to her phone and sends Marang a message.
Dineo: “ o satlo nnyela oo...this nobody as he called me o sa tlo mo jesa ka di pipe....wa ntshamekela o im sure o nagana gore ke ngwana wa le premature” (he’s gonna shit himself...this nobody as he called me will make him sweat....he doesn’t know me im sure he thinks that I was born a premature)
Marang: “who are you talking about now?” 
Dineo: “ ramarete nyana o mongwe wa go nnyatsa” ( some dickhead who’s thinks he’s better than me)
Marang: “ shame I already feel sorry for him”
She send laughing emogis.
Dineo: “ o biditse nna ka a nobody....hehe batho ba bangwe ba nnyela ko dipitseng while rena re nnyela ko di toileteng waitsi mara go monate go ba bona ” ( he called me a nobody....hehe some people take a shit inside pots while some of us take a shit inside a toilet...it’s nice to be them shame)
Marang send back laughing emogis.
Marang: “ kemang yena oo wa go latella noga ko mokoting wa yona” ( who’s that person that follows a snake inside its hole)
Dineo: “ ramarete nyana o mongwe so....sa wara ka yena he’s not that important” ( some dickhead, don’t worry he’s not that important)
Marang: “ o sa mo utlwisa botlhoko thata clearly he doesn’t know you” ( don’t hurt him too bad clearly he doesn’t know you)
Dineo: “ he deserves it....ke batla gore next time a re ‘Ashee ausi Dineo’ ge a ntumedisa” ( he deserves it.... next time he sees me I want him to say ‘hello sister Dineo’ when he greets)
Marang send many laughing emogis and Dineo giggled....Kgosi looked at her briefly then he sighed....he wasn’t used to a “ mute” and distant Dineo, he wished he handled things better.....he looked over at his rearview mirror and the car behind theirs has been following them for quite a while now....he looked at the number plate and it looked new but the car was old.....he took his phone and dialed Cole.
Cole: King
Kgosi: ons word gevolg (we are being followed)
Cole: wat? (what)
Kgosi: moenie bekommerd wees nie, ek het alles onder beheer......ek het n plan en ek sal alles daaroor vertel as ek by jou kom ( don’t worry I got everything under control.....i have a plan and I’ll tell you all about it when I get to you)
Cole: ok wees veilig (ok be safe)
Kgosi: altyd man ( always man)
Then they ended the call then he called another number.
Voice: heita
Kgosi: Javas ke King
Jabu: hebanna....the mighty Igwe
Kgosi chuckled.
Kgosi: listen my bra bloma o le vaker ke tlo go tlhoka after bo ma hour(a) nyana ( listen bro stay vigilant Im gonna need you after an hour or so)
Jabu: everything e grand Igwe? ( is everything ok Igwe?)
Kgosi: no ke shaiwa mosela blaine and ke nale itsi nyana mo transing so ke tlago belela later re over shapo ( no im being followed and I have someone in the car with me so I’ll call you later and we will talk freely)
Jabu: ok I’ll wait for your call then nja yam
Kgosi: tops
Jabu: sho
They ended the call and Dineo was surprised that Kgosi could speak tsotsi taal ( thug language) like that.