Just Another Nightmare

The Beauty Of Nature [1]

I squinted at the bright light filtering in from my now open curtains. With a groan, I turned over, pulling the sheets over my head. It was just another nightmare.

"Did you have to open those?" The response I got was an annoyed sigh. I sat up and stared at the bed sheets. "What time is it?" My voice came out hoarse and I cleared my throat.

"7:34." His response was cold. Blank. I glanced up and stared at him. He looked back at me. God, I wish he'd give me some expression.

"How did you sleep?"

I shrugged and yawned, pushing my tangled mess of light brown hair away from my face, letting it cascade past my hips. "Fine, I guess." I watched as he pursed his lips and tied the curtains back.

I tried to change the subject. "I was thinking maybe this weekend we could go get the car checked out--"

"That's bullshit."

"What? We need to get that engine looked at or it's never going to run agai-"

"Not that. You were tossing and turning all night. Elise you kept me up. 'Fine I guess.' Fine my ass. The AC was on full blast and it was freezing but you were sweating. Kept saying something about looking for a damn handle."

I let my bangs fall in my face and cover the red flushing to my cheeks. "I don't know. I don't remember having any dreams." I tripped over my words and avoided his gaze sheepishly.

He sat down on the edge of the bed and took my face in his hands, stroking his thumb gently across my cheek.

"I'm not upset with you, so don't think that I'm angry about it. I'm just worried about you." I closed my eyes and let myself enjoy the warmth of his touch. "I know." I took one of his hands from my face and held it in my own.

"I'm okay, Noah. I'm right here and I'm not going anywhere." This didn't seem to reassure him much. I sighed and closed my eyes, letting the suns rays warm my now chilled skin.

Within an instant, I felt the gentle embrace of his lips on my own and for a moment, I felt safe. I wish moments like these could last forever.

"I just miss you." Tears began to sting my eyes as my voice shook and cracked.

His smile was so gentle. "What are you talking about? I'm right in front of you." He landed a soft kiss on my cheek. "Kissing you," And another, "Holding your hand." He held my head with both his hands and pressed his lips to my forehead lightly. "Where else would I be?"

I sniffled, unable to form a response and he wiped my eyes. "You know I'll love you no matter what. You don't have to hide this stuff from me. It's not embarrassing, no matter how many times you tell me it is."

I shook my head and let out a false laugh. "I feel like a little kid."

"It happens to everyone."

"Not this much."

"So what? That's not your fault."

I still felt like it was. I nodded. "I know-- You're right I'm sorry."

I felt a small smile come to my face and I was flushed with embarrassment. "You're always making me feel better." The tears started to flood out of my eyes again and I dropped my head into his chest. "I'm sorry."

With a light hand, Noah ran his fingers through my hair and shushed me.

"Don't be."

~~~

Was Noah home yet? The quiet murmur of the television leaked under the door and I assumed he was. Either that or he left it on again. I knocked again and bit at my nail subconsciously.

Each time I called the phone would end up going to voicemail. Now it wouldn't even ring.

My impatience began to control me as I banged on the door again but became distracted when I noticed the crimson shine of blood on my finger. "Look like I bit too far down." I listened to my voice echo in the apartment hallway and looked up at the yellowing light bulb.

I knew I was in a rush this morning after my fiasco of emotions but, I still couldn't help but tell myself "All you had to do was grab your keys."

All the fatigue of the day began to rush to my head and I took a seat at the doorstep, resting my head against the old wood of the door as I was overcome with exhaustion. I sighed as I felt myself begin to succumb to the calls of my body telling me to sleep.

As I closed my eyes, light faded into darkness and I was filled with a peaceful calm.

~~~

The minute I opened my eyes I became aware of the soft breeze and for once, I wasn't surrounded in darkness. Instead the world erupted in a vibrant array of colors and beautiful shades of blues, yellows, and lots of greens decorated the scene.

There were crowded woods, separated into halves by a shimmering lake, shining with the bright reflection of the sun. A gentle sprinkle of rain fell onto my skin and provided relief from the sun's piercing rays.

This was relaxing.

I watched as the occasional bird swooped down to pick at a bug or to sing by the waters edge. I noticed the glimmering fish swimming frantically in the water, avoiding the hungry pecks of much larger birds. A pair of deer stepped out of the forest, nearly in unison, and approached the lake, desperate for a chance to refresh themselves from the now sweltering hot sun.

It was only then that I realized that the rain had stopped and the sun now became warmer, slowly turning painful. I hissed as burning blisters began to open and pop on my skin. The rocks under me were stabbing excruciating wounds on my bare as I ran to the water.

Despite my body being submerged into the water, I didn't find relief from the pain. The sting of salt water filled every wound and blister and I began to writhe in agony. My screams for help never escaped my throat and instead were silent.

I clawed for some kind of surface to grip only to have my hand meet something skinny and covered in fur. I gripped and began to pull myself up, but my weight was too much for the mysterious creature and instead all I accomplished was ripping out a clump of hair.

I gasped for air and felt my lungs fill with the boiling liquid. Tears burned lines into my cheeks, hotter than anything else I had felt before. With every gulp for air I felt my insides melt into nugatory slush.

The scorching tears that rushed down my face had no intention of stopping.

As weariness began to set in and my will to fight began to dissipate, my wild thrashing turned to stillness. Sinking endlessly in the lake to a bottom that did not exist, the world around me became one color.

Red.

~~~

Shock filled my body and I screamed as I returned to the apartment hallway, the same yellow light still flickering above my head. I continued to screech in panic as I realized the clumps of pulled hair in my fists were my own. With no time to breathe, a rough hand gripped my face, covering my mouth and muffling my terror. Within a matter of seconds, I had been dragged back into the apartment room and lifted to my feet before being slammed into a wall.

"What the fuck is wrong with you?" The enraged shout came from a face I recognized and I began to shake violently as my eyes met Noah's and filled up with tears.

The look of rage on his face quickly softened into one of regret. Not knowing what to do, he tried to comfort me frantically.

"Hey! Hey, no! Baby I'm sorry. Don't cry." With each convulsive sob I found it harder to breathe as my chest tightened up.

"Hey, you're hyperventilating. You're going to hurt yourself stop." His voice was softer now, but I couldn't relax, not now. Why would he yell at me?

My body continued to shake violently even as he stroked my head and whispered relaxing words to me. After a few minutes, I was able to feel the tension leave my body bit by bit. I let myself take a deep breath and wrapped my arms around Noah's body, his welcoming embrace bringing me comfort.

When would he have enough of me?