𝐝𝐞𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐪𝐮𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐬 ━ queen group chat

CHAPTER 31 - brian jerks off to photos of rocks and space dust

federick b: brian jerks off to photos of rocks and space dust

jentucky: OH MY GOD it was one time

jim (female): i
i give up

leatherface: oh

jentucky: liSTSEN my actions from the past do not necessarily represent the person i am today

not grass: isn't that how being a person kind of works though

jentucky: not if it means i'm known as "the guy who jerked off to outer space" for another two years

jim (female): THAT WAS YOU??

jentucky: sadly yes

jim (female): i always thought that was the other brian

jentucky: what other brian

jim (female): uh
you know
,
brian

jentucky: ohhhhhhhhh
fuck that guy

jim (female): i know right hes such an asshole

federick b: GUYS
GUYS IM SUCH A GENIUS

leatherface: what happened

federick b: JIM

jim (female): yessss?

federick b: THE FEMALE VERSION OF YOUR NAME IS JEMIMA

jim (female): OH MY GOD UR RIGHT

jim (female) has changed jim (female)'s nickname to jemima!

jemima; !!!!!!!!!!!

federick b: !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
o yeah also
roger
brian and i need u

not grass: for what lol

federick b: it's a secret

jentucky: 🤫🤫

not grass: you two are so strange
but ok i'll come

federick b: YAY
it's not actually a secret though we just have a plan to get hohn to talk to you again

not grass: hohn
we need to get him back to the chat quick to i can name him hohn
where r u guys?

jentucky: you know the playground where freddie almost broke his neck

not grass: that could be like 3 different places

jemima: why am i not surprised

jentucky: remember the time when we just met fred and decided to spin him around on the spinny thing as fast as we could
but he was like 90 pounds
so he fell off

federick b: my neck still cracks every time i move it too fast

not grass: ah thats the playground
good times
be there in 15 mins

jentucky: get your "i'm sorry" speech ready

— chat: john

john: where are you i thought u were coming to the park?
its the one where freddie almost broke his neck for the first time right

brian: yesh freddie and i will be there soon
*yeah

john: yesh
hahawhwhahs brian had a lisp

brian: no i dont fuck off

john: remember when you had braces

brian: i try to forget

john: #neverforget 😔🤟
ok but what's taking you two so long to get here

brian: freddie saw a dog
a pomeranian to be exact
we may be here a while

john; tell him to hurry up i don't care about the pomoranien

brian: how did you misspell pomeranian that badly

john: it's a fucking hard word

brian: i think freddie's in love with it

john: jesus christ

brian: ok im coming
see u soon

john: i see someone walking in the distance
did you leave freddie with the dog?
wait nvm that's not you
oh
wait a SECOND
FUCK YOU BRIAN
i'm not fucking talking to that bastard

brian: yes you are idc

john: i can't believe you fooled me like this

brian: believe it, bitch

john: i hate you fr

— chat: anti-roger squad

not grass: first of all let's change this chat name

not grass has changed the chat name to roger taylor has the best looking leaked nudes in the entire high school

jemima: since when did you have leaked nudes??
i'm asking for science

not grass: january of sophomore year

federick b: it's been half an hour since you started talking to deaks
did u kill him?

not grass: no lmao we made up
we're getting food at the convenience store rn
does anyone want anything?

federick b: peanut m&ms and an arizona iced tea

jemima; gummy sharks

leatherface: a coffee w cream and 2 sugars pls

jentucky: a will to live

not grass: sorry brian those are too expensive

jentucky; aw fuck

leatherface: (i can't believe you've done this)

not grass: also john is bugging me to add him back

not grass has added john to roger taylor has the best looking leaked nudes in the entire high school

not grass has changed john's nickname to hohn!

hohn; what

not grass: hi hohn

hohn: hi homer
*hoger

not grass: i am homer simpson

hohn has changed not grass's nickname to homer simpson!

homer simpson; i was so tired of being not grass thank u buddy

hohn; ur welcome

federick b: :,) i missed this dymanic

—

quick poll since i'm seeing a bunch of mixed views:

comment here for joger

comment here for no joger