𝐝𝐞𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐪𝐮𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐬 ━ queen group chat

CHAPTER 32 - pee pee

the timeline for this fic is so fucked i'm posting this in august

also thank you guys so much for over 30k reads?????? this is surreal and i can't thank you all enough for the support you all show this story. love u all!!!!!!!!

—

jentucky: ROG MY MOM JUST CALLED U A CRACKPOT

homer simpson: wHAT

jentucky:

homer simpson: RUDE
DOESNT SHE KNOW ITS MY BIRTHDAY

federick b: why are you looking for a crockpot

jemima: why is your mom's contact photo a roblox meme

jentucky: both valid questions

jemima: also happy birthday roger

hohn: HAPPY BIRTH

federick b: U R OLD

jemima: freddie you're the oldest

jentucky: my birthday was last week and nobody said anything,,

hohn: oh

homer simpson: oh
PRTY AT BRUANS TO MAKE UP DOR IT

hohn: YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

federick b: bruans

jentucky: NO
NO PARTY
i didn't consent to this

homer simpson: plEEASE
I PROBABLY WONT EVEN HAVE SEX IN UR BATHROOM THIS TIME

jentucky: "probably"

homer simpson: no promises

jentucky: hhhdhrhhhhhhhhhhhhh
i'll ask my parents

federick b: ha nerd who asks their parents anymore

hohn: freddie you need ur parents permission to drink a can of soda

federick b: touché

jentucky: they said yes

jemima: can i come

jentucky: yes ofc everyone is invited
as long as you don't fuck anywhere
plus i need mary to keep me sane

homer simpson: wait wait
first it was no fucking in the bathrrom
now it's no fucking ANYWHERE????
WHAT IS THIS

jentucky: ???????????
NOBODY IS ALLOWED TO COMMIT SEXUAL ACTS OF ANY SORT IN MY HOUSE

hohn: rog who would you be performing intercourse with anyway

homer simpson: good question my dear jonathan

jemima: "performing intercourse with" u sound like mrs. hanneford

jentucky: who?

jemima: the health teacher??

jentucky: oh
i've been skipping her class since our first year
it's gotten to the point where i didn't even know what class i was skipping

federick b: DONT SPEAK HER NAME
IF YOU SAY IT 3 TIMES IN FRONT OF A MIRROR SHE'LL APPEAR BEHND YOU AND TELL YOU ABOUT THE DANGERS OF PREMARITAL SEX

jemima: i typed it dumb bitch

hohn: did roger fucking call me jonathon

homer simpson: no i called you jonathAn actually

hohn: fuck off you misspelled 'carrot' yesterday

homer simpson: IT WAS AN HONEST MISTAKE SUCK MY pee pee
pee pee
what the fuck
i'm not saying pee pee

federick b: HEHFJFJDJJEXSKKS

homer simpson: WHO CHANGED pee pee IN MY PHONE TO pee pee

federick b: IT WASNT ME THIS TIME I SWAR

hohn: brian's laughing so hard he started choking

jemima: oh no

federick b: BRIAN LOVE R U OKAY

jentucky: yes i'm fine i just threw up a little bit
wait did u just call me love

federick b: yes because i love u

jemima: is that so

federick b: yeah sorry jim but it's hard to resist brian's natural charm

homer simpson: did u miss the part where he choked on his own spit and got sick

federick b: like i said
natural charm

hohn: ok guys back to a more interesting topic

homer simpson: what could possibly be more  insterestimf that brian making a fool of himself

hohn: me

federick b: hmm,,, sounds doubtful

hohn: someone called me jack yesterday????
and then i was like "my name is john actually"
and then they said "oh yeah i know it's a nickname"
whta—

leatherface; well
technically jack IS a nickname for john
just not your nickname
also i'm awake hi

jemima: it's 3pm

leatherface: yeah? and?

jemima: .
that's fair

hohn: but
but jack is already a name
how is it a nickname

leatherface: idk i used to know someone named john who went by jack

hohn; but they're different nAMES
HOW CAN JACK BE A NICKNAME FOR JOHN IF JACK IS ALREADY A NAME

leatherface: zI DONT KNOW
DO I LOOK LIKE THR NAME POLICE TO U?

homer simpson has changed leatherface's nickname to name police

homer simpson: yes
yes it does

jentucky; oh my god phineas and ferb

federick b: can we watch that at the party

jentucky: yes
(yes we can)
the whole night is dedicated to watching every episode of phineas and ferb

name police: i didn't know there was gonna be a party but i'm down

hohn: PHINEAD AND FERB PARTY

federick b: yeaHHHH

homer simpson: no
phineas and ferb FIESTA

hohn has changed the chat name to PHINEAS AND FERB FIESTA