The Way We Feel

THANK YOU

My lovely readers,

I feel like I knew exactly where to start the two thank you notes for OOTO and ALLO, but with this one I'm drawing a huge blank. I think it's just disbelief. Or maybe an unwillingness to believe that after almost exactly five years of posting these stories, they're all over.

Idk. One of the two. Maybe both.

And too many emotions to count. Just had a good cry editing the last chapter for the last time. Which will probably happen again when I post it. And for a while afterwards.

But here we are. At the end of a three-story series that's been my constant for five years. No matter what was going on in my life—different jobs, family deaths, new experiences, emotional turmoil—I always had Friday evenings reserved for posting the next chapter. I always had Harry and Mads keeping me company through whatever it was I was going through.

So it's been hard to admit to myself that it's over, but it also feels right. The right time for me, and the right place in their story to let them live on in our imaginations, content and looking forward. Sort of like I am, I suppose.

I have new stories I want to tell. New characters who've been lingering at the back of my mind for ages, just waiting for me to unleash them. And I want to introduce you to all of them. I hope that you'll stick around to meet them, and that you'll love them as much as I do.

But for a little longer, let's focus on Harry and Mads. Our babies. When I started writing their story almost five years ago (June 17th, 2014 to be exact), I had hopes of reaching a sequel, and hopes that there would be readers somewhere out there who would be willing to join me for their journey. But I also didn't even know if I would get that far. Just in terms of how much I'd be able to write. If these characters would speak to me long enough to get that far.

Three books later, I guess it's obvious that they didn't shut up lol. And they were so easy to write all this time because they were so REAL to me. I loved every moment of taking the incredible, talented, beautiful, and kind Harry Styles we all admire and love, and writing him as a human being who has insecurities and doubts and who makes BIG mistakes. I loved working with him to right those mistakes. I loved fleshing Madelyn out, creating what I hope is a three-dimensional character just as real to you as Harry is. She's certainly real to me—her many flaws and all.

I loved watching them fail and try again. I loved watching them work together—have fun together. I loved their highs and I loved their lows. I loved the way they loved each other, making the choice to love each other every time things grew difficult. And that's my biggest takeaway from these stories, I think. That to love is to CHOOSE someone as much as it is to love them. It's the choice to compromise, the choice to give in sometimes, the choice to pick someone up when they're down, and root for them every step of the way. It's a commitment that requires many choices every day—and those choices often require lots of hard work.

It sounds silly to say that my own characters taught me that, but it's true. Because while I enjoyed every moment of writing their story, it took a LOT of hard work and so much thought I drove myself crazy at times. I had to consider and reconsider everything I know about love (which really isn't much) and everything I hope it can be. I had to think hard about the choices I would make, and then shove all that aside and think about the choices Harry and Mads would make. I had to wonder again and again if some of those choices would make sense in terms of plot. I had to make choices that broke my heart, and choices that pieced it back together again.

All while trying to keep things fresh and unique, but still believable in the context of this couple and their relationship.

I don't know that I always succeeded, but I LOVED. EVERY. MINUTE. Even when they drove me absolutely nuts.

And through it all, more and more of you joined the party. It's reached a point now where I'm so behind on answering comments that I don't think I'll ever catch up and for that I'm truly sorry, because I appreciate hearing from you SO much. More than I could ever explain.

There are several of you who come to mind when I think about how much your dedication and love for these stories has struck me, but it would be impossible to name you all, and I wouldn't want to forget to mention anyone. So I'll just say this. Your passion for these characters has shocked me countless times. How much you've been able to feel for them. How DEEPLY you've felt for them.

And how much your love for them has stretched to encompass me as well. Like I said, I had all kinds of hopes when I started writing and posting OOTO, but never in my wildest dreams did I imagine it reaching this point. It's no exaggeration to say that the support I've felt from you all is what's made it possible for me to get to the end of this third book. Without you, without the confidence in myself that you've given me, I don't think it would've happened.

So, THANK YOU. It sounds insincere now that I've said it a thousand times, but I still mean it with every fiber of my being. Thank you for your readership. Thank you for your support. Your love. Your passion. Your excitement. Thank you for feeling their hurt. Thank you for loving their love. Thank you for trusting me with every chapter, and rooting for me and them, even when you didn't necessarily like what was happening. I can't tell you how many times, in a moment of doubt or fear, I would read your comments and feel strong again. Sure of myself again. Hopeful again.

And I'm so, so grateful. Truly.

So, before I sign off here, let me assure you that I'll be around. I will try to answer all the comments I've missed. (If you get notifications from me dating back to comments from months ago, don't judge me lmao). And I WILL be back with a new story for you. I don't know when, and I don't think I could write Harry again, but Emily and Mark are swimming around in my brain ;) Plus lots of other characters who I think you'd like, too. Not to mention, these three stories will remain on Wattpad for you to reread to your heart's content!

AHHHHH, I don't know how to end this. Okay. Um. *gulp*

Okay.

We're here. It's the end. We knew it was coming. Still not ready though.

Okay. I love you. I'm grateful for every single one of you. And the experience of writing for you is one I will carry with me for the rest of my life. Just as I hope you'll carry Mads and Harry's story with you into the rest of yours.

Wishing you all the best, as always.

Signing off here with lots of love in my heart,

Laura xx