I Know You Can't Speak

15: Vince's Violence part 2:

I never made it back to work the next day. Vince made me change my number so that no one from my job could get in contact with me. After the run in with Lawrence, Vince said that he didn't trust me working there or anywhere for that matter. The abuse got worse and I felt like a prisoner in my own home. When I found out that I was pregnant by Vince, I cried for days and nights because truth of the matter was, I didn't want to keep that baby. I didn't want to bring the baby into an unstable and unhappy environment and most of all, I didn't want my child to have Vince as a father.  He was the devil and I prayed to God every night to get me out of that situation. One night he finally heard my prayers.

It was around 2am as I lay wide awake in bed. Tears streamed down my face as I lay alone because Vince wasn't home and I just knew he was out cheating. I didn't care that he was. It was actually a relief for him to be away from me but, I was tired of being in a situation I was not happy in. I laid there for a few seconds longer before I decided I had had enough. I got up, tossing clothes in a bag trying to hurry up because I didn't know when Vince would be home. The last thing I needed was for him to come home and catch me trying to leave. I opened the door and made my way out of the building, making sure the coast was clear. I breathed a sigh of relief as I put my key in my car door to open it before climbing in but in one quick motion, I felt someone grab the back of my neck.

"Where you think you going bitch?" He said as he grabbed me out of the car.

"It's two thirty in the morning, the fuck you doing outside?" Vince asked violently.

"I... I ..." I stuttered as he looked in my back seat. He noticed the bag of clothes and his eyes grew wide.

"Oh you was trying to leave me?!" He asked as he gripped my hair. It felt like he was pulling my hair from my scalp. I screamed as he dragged me back into the house hoping my screams would be loud enough for someone to hear or see me. Nobody did.

"Who the fuck you think you is tryna leave me bitch?" He asked as he slammed me to the ground.

"Vince please, just let me leave!" I begged but to no avail. He beat and punched on me like I was a male that he was fighting in the streets and the last thing I remember before passing out was him on top of me, forcing himself in side of me as he told me "this my pussy! & if I can't have you, nobody can!"

I came to in an ambulance.

"We're losing her!"

I felt like I could barely breathe before an oxygen mask was placed around my mouth.

"It's okay I'm not going to let you die. Stick with me Jas" the EMT said. His voice sounded familiar but, through my black eyes, I could barely see. Everything was faint and I was in and out of consciousness.

I had broken ribs, my lungs were bruised, I had a concussion and both of my eyes were black. I was in and out of sleep for days and when I awoke to be fully aware and conscious, I found out that I had been beaten so severely that it caused me to miscarry. I don't know if I was crying tears of joy or pain when the doctors told me but a part of me felt relieved that I had lost Vince's baby. One of my neighbors had heard the noise that night and called the cops.

"If we wouldn't have gotten to you when we did, you wouldn't have made it" the doctor told me with sincerity in his voice. "The EMT who picked you up has been in here everyday checking on you. He seemed very concerned" the doctor told me.

"Who?" I asked him confused.

"He didn't say what his name was. He would just stop in during his breaks and see how you were doing" the doctor told me. My mind automatically shifted to Vince. I knew he wasn't an EMT but he was crafty enough to pretend to be one just to see me.

"It's probably my boyfriend" I said panicking. I was scared out of my mind for Vince to come anywhere near me again. I was sure that the next time he saw me, he would be sure to kill me.  The doctors asked me a ton of questions involving my incident. Counselors came to talk to to offer assistance. It was a relief to finally have some help. To be free.

Just then, Deja walked into the room.

"Oh my goodness Jas!" She cried out as she ran over to me. I had no idea how she even knew where I was. She cried as she laid on me.

"Jas I'm so sorry this keeps happening to you. I promise I'm never leaving your side!" She told me as she kissed me on my face.

"Deja how did you know where I was?" I asked her curiously.

"Ya co worker. Because I stopped by your job because I hadn't heard from you and she told me you hadn't been to work. Said that this customer came in saying how he was your emt or whatever. So I called all the hospitals and you was here" she told me as she pulled her chair to my bedside. She kept talking but the doctors came in and gave me pain meds and my mind drifted off to this mystery emt driver before I fell asleep.

***

I woke up to Aiyana at my bedside where Deja had once been.

"Hi baby!" She said as she held my hand.

"Hey, how long have you been here?" I asked her sleepily.

"I just got here" She told me. She pulled a chair up as we began talking and she began asking me a million questions. The same questions I had been answering all day. I didn't feel like talking or answering but I figured I may as well get it over with. Deja had just asked me the same questions the day before and I was honestly tired of talking about it. The "why didn't you tell me" and "how long was this going on" and "who else knew" answers almost rolled off my tongue.

"How did you know I was here?" I asked her.
"My sister said a guy came in our job or something?"

"Oh yeah! Lawrence! He's been so concerned about you. He was your EMT that night. That's crazy right?" She asked me without letting me answer. We were disrupted by a knock at the door. All I saw were flowers and balloons at first and from behind them, Lawrence appeared.

I started blushing and immediately became embarrassed once I remembered my condition. I didn't want him to see me all broken, with black eyes.

"Hi-hey" I said as he sat the flowers on the table.

"Hi Jas, how you feeling?" he asked me.

"I've been better" I said laughing which I quickly stopped because it hurt too bad.

"Hey Lawrence. Jas I'm gonna get outta here & let you two talk" Aiyana told me as she stood up to leave. Lawrence stayed my whole visit. We talked about everything. Starting from the the beginning of me & Vince. I don't know why I felt so comfortable telling him everything but out of everyone that had came to see me, he seemed the most easiest, non judgmental & unbiased to talk to.

"I kind of sensed something was wrong that day in your job" he told me truthfully. "I should have done something."

"There wasn't anything you could have done. It would have just made matters worse" I told him reassuringly.

"Yeah well, nothing will ever happen to you again. It's so crazy that I wasn't even supposed to work that night. I picked up a shift and ironically enough, you were my last run of the night. I stayed at the hospital for a long time after I got off" he told me as he caressed my hand. We watched tv for the remainder of his visit until I fell asleep feeling like God had finally heard my prayers.