An Iron Heart - Tony x reader

He can't be gone

Fate is such a cruel thing it knows pretty well that we both cannot be together then why the hell did it introduce you in my life

"Get me all eyes in the situation" you yelled at the agents "get me the avengers location". "What's happening" an agent cried before turning to dust. Your eyes were glued to were the agent was before a series of screams were let out.  You saw more of your agents turning to dust this couldn't be happening. You rushed to your room and put you suit on quickly running past the weapons room to get your weapons. You heard a faint buzzing from the watch on your wrist that let you communicate with avengers. "Y/n....were sorry... we lost" "cap what do you mean we lost" you said tears starting to fill your eyes. "He won" you fell to the floor your eyes clouding your vision your body becoming numb from everything around you. "And tony..." you said with a shaking voice "the last time we saw him he was on titan facing Thanos... I'm sorry but I think he's gone" you brushed yourself of the ground and started walking out of the building. Your senses had became numb and your heart was broken. "Return to the tower Steve" "but we cant just" Steve tried to argue back "return to the tower now" you said venom in your voice".

(Y/n) had been pacing around the compound all day thinking of new ways to bring the avengers back. "(Y/n) calm down" Nat said pulling you into a hug "we can help get them back but you need to calm down" Nat whispered into your ear. "I lost him.. Nat.. I think I love him" you closed your eyes and let the tears fall down your cheeks "let's go to bed we can work this out in the morning" Steve said leading you to the bedroom.

I was drifting of in space with an alien named nebula. "I lost the kid nebula, I lost peter" tony said holding his hands were peter once was. "And y/n might of been dusted as well I can't lose both of them i need y/n i .... love her" tony said bursting out into tears.

I couldn't sleep all night my head was pounding with thoughts of what if, what if we couldn't save everyone, what if you didn't see tony again what if you never got to tell him that "hey you wanna talk about yesterday" Steve said looking at you glumly. "What's their to talk about we lost" you say a tear sliding down your cheek. Steve sat down on the bed next to you "We have to try" .

A/n tony said he was in space for twenty something days and that's really close to a month so...

One month later

This was the end for me I had made friends with nebula and she had told me about her struggles and losts. I'm growing weaker each day and were trying to get back to earth bu5 each day a little part of me dies. Tony got up of the ground and turned to his helmet before plopping himself on the ground again. 

"Is this thing on? Hey, Y/n. If you find this recording, don't post it on social media. It's gonna be a real tearjerker. I don't know if you're ever gonna see these. I don't even know if you're still... Oh, God, I hope so. Today's day 21? No, uh, 22. You know, if it wasn't for the existential terror of steering into the literal void of space, I'd say I'm feeling a little better today. The infection's run its course thanks to the blue meanie back there. Oh, you would love her. Very practical. Only a tiny bit sadistic. So, the fuel cells were cracked during battle and we figured out a way to reverse the iron charge, bought ourselves about 48 hours of flight time. Uh, but it's now dead in the water. 1,000 light years from the nearest 7-11. Oxygen will run out tomorrow morning... and that will be it. I know I said no more surprises, but I gotta say, I was really hoping to pull off one last one. But it looks like... well, you know what it looks like. Don't feel bad about this. I'm mean, actually, if you grovel for a couple weeks... and then move on with enormous guilt.

Tony pauses tears forming in his eyes

I should probably lie down for a minute, rest my eyes. Please know, when I drift off and be like everything lately, I'm fine. I'm totally fine. I dream about you. Because it's always you.

You had been working with the Natasha trying to find out a way to fix this. Steve would sometimes pop in and give you two lunch but the others would come every so often. You felt like you were about to cry and headed back to your room to hide the tears on your bed was the Ironman helmet you had been sleeping with for the last few days. You picked it up and hugged it to your chest. Beep beep beep. You pulled the helmet away from you to see it flashing "what?" You said tilting your head. You put the helmet on your head and started listening to the message. You rushed outside to see tony coming out of a spaceship he was struggling to walk and looked fragile. "Hey tony" you said taking him into arms "I missed you". He held onto you tightly refusing to let you go. 

I missed her so much having her in my arms again was such a relief. The team helped me down to the meeting room to discuss what happened with the snap. Even thinking about it sent shivers up my spine "Hey tony" Steve said looking at tony. "We've been hunting Thanos for three weeks now - through face scans and satellites, so far we've got nothing. Tony, you fought him..." Steve said trailing off. "What are you talking about? I didn't fight him. No, he wiped my face with a planet while the wizard gave away the store. That's what happened, there's no fight..."  tony said getting agitated. "Okay, did he give you any clues, any coordinates?" Steve chimed back.

 "I saw this coming a few years back, I had a vision, but I didn't want to believe it. Now it's true." Tony said trailing off guilt filling his eyes. "Tony, I'm going to need you to focus..." Steve spoke back softly. "I *needed* you, as in past tense. That trumps what you need. It's too late, buddy. Sorry. You know what I need? You know what I need? I need a shave. I don't believe I ever remember telling you this..." tony said storming off. "Tony, Tony..." Steve said trying to stop tony from leaving. "What we needed was a suit of armor around the world! Remember that? Whether it impacted our precious freedoms or not, that's what we needed!" Tony spat spinning around. "Well, that didn't work out, did it?" Steve yelled back. "I said we'd lose. You said, "we'll do that together too." Guess what, Cap? We *lost,* and you weren't there. But that's what we do, right? Our best work after the fact? We're the *Avengers?* Not the Prevengers, right?" The team was silent not looking at Steve or tony feeling guilty for what happened.

 "Okay, you made your point, Just sit down, okay?" Said rhode trying to get tony to sit down on the couch. "No, no, here's my biggest point, he said..." "Just sit down, okay?" Rhode yelled cutting tony off. "Bunch of tired old wheels! I got nothin' for you, Cap! I've got no coordinates, no clues, no strategies, no options! Zero, zip, nada. No trust - liar." Tony spat ripping off his ark reactor and handing it to Steve. "Here, take this. You'll find him, if you put that on. You hide - tony collapsed mid sentence. Cap stormed out of the room and you looked at tony before going to speak to cap.

A/n told you I would make this chapter longer