When I See You Again (MxB)

1. Jude

I thrust into her one last time before I finally emptied myself into the condom. My body sagged and I pulled out of her moments before collapsing by her side.

"That was amazing." The girl said breathlessly and my lips turned up in a humorless way. She passed out after a few seconds and I got up and stumbled towards the attached bathroom. I was too drunk to even put one foot in front of the other. I switched on the light inside the crappy motel bathroom and instantly regretted it.

The door directly opened to a sink with a fucked up mirror on top of it. Even the crap state of the mirror couldn't hide the horror that my face has become over the past months. Well, technically it didn't look too bad, but I knew myself better than anyone. So my insanely good quality of being able to lie to people didn't exactly work with me.

I had bags under my eyes, just enough to let you know that I wasn't a chronic insomniac but I wasn't getting enough sleep. They were visible on the fair skin of my face. I've lost a little bit weight and that showed on the prominent lines of my jaw which had become just a tad bit sharper. Adding to that, there was a five-o lock shadow on my face that I didn't care to shave and I was told that it made me look 'rugged'. Whatever.

However, there was no afterglow glory on my face. It looked like I've got out of bed tired. The usual glow that good sex brought with it wasn't there. Don't get me wrong, the girl was really good at what she was doing. It's just, nobody felt as good as Fey.

The thought of him made a sudden gush of searing pain slice through my gut. Is this what happened when you were estranged from the person who was probably the love of your life? I guess.

I rubbed my hand on my stomach, trying to soothe the phantom pain, it didn't help. I sighed and got rid of the condom and cleaned up before making my way back into the room.

The girl was out cold. So I put the money I was supposed to pay her on top of the bedside drawer. Then I got dressed quietly and got out of there. The room was paid for till ten tomorrow morning, so she'd be able to get a good night's sleep.

I called for a cab when I got out of the building. The cool air of the night soothed a bit of the nausea that drinking away your sorrows brought with itself. Word of wisdom - it worked for about ten minutes.

I tuned out the crappy music that the driver played in the cab and looked out of the window to see the streetlights pass by like glimpses of phantom hope. You try to hold on to them, but they're gone too soon.

My drunk philosophy comes to a halt when the driver pulled in front of my apartment building. I paid him and got out of the car and teetered my way towards the lift. Once inside, I pressed the button that took me to my floor and pressed my head against the cool metal of the car. I got out of it gingerly when I reached my floor and wasted no time in opening the door to my apartment and sauntering into my bedroom. I took of my shoes and belt before throwing my body face first into the bed. The soft sheets were mercifully cool and helped me drift off to sleep in no time.

I woke up with the worst headache of the century. It wouldn't be as bad if it was just my head that was hurting, but it felt like the pain radiated through my whole upper body every time I moved. My eyes hurt the worst, but at least the curtains were drawn. I picked up my phone and looked at the time. It was almost 11. Shit!

I begrudgingly got up and went to the bathroom. After taking some medicine for the headache, I brushed my teeth and took a quick shower. Putting on a jeans and a t-shirt, I went to the kitchen to make myself a cup of tea. I scrolled through my Instagram while sipping on my tea. And like a pathetic excuse of a human that I was, I opened Faiyaz's Instagram again. Like every morning. Maybe I was holding on too hard to someone who didn't even care about me, but seeing his face first thing in the morning, even if it was in a six inch screen, was the best part of my day.