Travenna State University

Chapter 8: Real V.S. Paper

My frat brothers ran downstairs to see what had happened. I took a glass plate by the spoons and slammed it across Brandon Lewis' face. His brothers ran up, but Charles jumped in between.
"Yo yo, what the fuck happened" He asked, grabbing me and taking me outside the cafe.
"I'ma fuckin' kill you bitch! I'ma fuckin' kill that nigga, I swear to God!" Brandon kept yelling as Don and Charles rushed me to the car. I wanted to stomp that nigga. I kept jumping up and trying to get at that nigga to handle my unfinished business.
Charles grabbed my face, "Nigga chill out!" He said looking at me seriously.
"Yo, Don take him to his room." Charles went back in the cafe to settle things and make sure campus police wasn't on their way. Don took me to my room and sat there with me until I calmed down.
"Yo, why yo ass slammed that plate in Brandon's face? You could of seriously hurt him or worst, kill him. What did he say to you?" Don asked, looking at me in shock. I told him that Brandon was trying to spread false homo rumors on me. "And you let pitty shit like that get under your skin my nigga?" Don asked rhetorically.
"When I was a freshman people said I was gay because me and my best friend were very close. Yo, you can't let petty shit like that get under your skin. You gotta just ignore these niggas. You a Rho now, so you gotta deal with a lot of childish shit on campus. Just chill out bruh." Don said, patting my shoulder.
I looked at him and nodded my head, "you right, you're right!" " Are you good? Do you need anything? He asked.
 
I told him no and that I'm fine. He told me that Charles texted him and said the police didn't come nor did Brandon press charges. Brandon was okay and only had a busted lip and a cut on his face.
"Call me if you need anything." Don said as he walked out the door.
I can't believe I let that nigga drive me to this point. I didn't know what was wrong with me. I was starting to lash out at people for no reason at times. Even though Brandon initiated the fight, I still felt bad and I knew my father would be disappointed in me. I still haven't told my father that I pledged Rho Psi Psi. I figured that tonight would be the best time to tell him the truth, so called him. My dad picked up the phone and by the tone of his voice I knew he wasn't happy already.
"Hey pops," I said in a low tone.
"What do you want boy?" My father said in an heavy dark gritty tone. I know I haven't spoken to my father in over 2 months, but I'm thinking that he would be proud to hear from me knowing that I was extremely busy with school work etc.
"Are you ok pops? I asked in a concerned manner.
"Don't you bullshit with me boy! Zaveon already told me what you been up to on that damn campus. You are a disgrace to my family's legacy."
My heart dropped down to my stomach. My father has never spoken to me in such a derisive way like that before. My father has never told me I was a disappoint to him or to our family's legacy. I felt neglected. He kept on talking, but I hung up the phone. I turned to my pillow and cried myself to sleep.
The next morning I woke up feeling terrible. Not in the terms of sickness, I was just over the day before it even started. I couldn't stop thinking about the fight in the cafe and the argument my father and I had. I couldn't believe Zaveon would talk to my father before I did. That shit was totally out of line. That wasn't his business to tell my information. I wasn't comfortable informing my father about joining Rho Psi Psi, but it was my place to tell, not his. I began to become angry all over again. I wanted to punch Zaveon in his face. He's worse than Brandon Lewis in my eyes. I couldn't believe I trusted that nigga. It's true about what they say about friends. Those niggas will rat you out the fastest. I was officially done Zaveon, our friendship was over for good. Yesterday was supposed to be one of the greatest moments of my life in undergrad, but it turned out to be horror. I wanted to stay in my room all day. I didn't want to walk around campus nor did I want to talk to my LBs.
Charles texted and called me, but I ignored it. This was my first time ever ignoring Charles calls or texts. I felt bad, but I just needed some time alone. I didn't want to be bothered nor did I want to talk. I got on the web to check my Facebook and email. My wall feed had almost student around campus congratulating me on crossing the Spring line of Rho Psi Psi. Inside, I was appreciative of the Facebook love, but on the outside I was still angry.
Blop Blop Blop! I got a message on Facebook. It was somebody that I just didn't want to talk to ever, Brandon Lewis!
"Thanks for throwing a plate at me. That was such a bitch ass move. It's ok, just come out of the closet. You will never love yourself until you do," he said sending a smiley face. He kept writing me. "I'ma expose you nigga for who you really are, paper Greek ass. I'll burn yo ass nigga," he said.
I told him, "Nigga I'm more real than you will ever be. There's no paper over here."
I can honestly say, he was only right about one thing and that was me being paper. I told him to "fuck off" and I went on his page to block and delete him. This dude was starting to become obsessed with me. I wasn't cool with Brandon nor have we ever been friends. The only thing I know about him is that he's a fruitcake that date's Zaveon's sister, Ashley Michaels. Ashley knows he's fucking boys around campus, but it doesn't faze her. She's just with him because of his status on campus, money and family name. Now, Ashley's no angel either. She fucked all his Line Brothers and they all talk about how they smashed Ashley every weekend when Brandon leaves town to play ball with his male friends.
The paper thing still stuck in my head. Paper is a term used to identify a Greek fraternity or sorority member who didn't pledge. This person became a member through either an intake process, or by joining a
graduate/alumni chapter. "Real" is a term used to identify those persons who underwent the pledge process. During the pledge period, they learn rituals, secrets, history, and tests of brotherhood & sisterhood through the teachings of the dean of pledging.
My Line Brothers and I had this conversation with Charles and Don about being called "paper." Charles told us that there were ways to avoid talking about our process or we could just fake it. Charles' line was hazed and they do consider themselves as "real." The crazy thing about this epidemic is that the quote on quote "real" Greeks think that they're better than other members who haven't been brutally beaten. Even our conversation with my Lbs compared to Charles line were absolutely different.
They always talk about their process and how long it took them to get off line. "Six months, one week, two days, two hours, thirty minutes and twenty-four seconds." They even talk about the pre-pledging process that lasted one month, one day, twenty-three minutes and six seconds. Don would always talk about certain tricks and mind games the pledge brothers would play on them. My favorite one he mentioned was called knocking on wood aka knocking the door down. There would be a door in front you and you would have to knock it down. He would tell us how many of his "pre-pledge" LBs would run into the door to knock it down.
This was so simple, but they weren't thinking at all. They forgot that these were just mind games. The solution to knocking the door down was walking up the door then knocking, with your hand, from the top of the door to the bottom of the door. Charles had a story about running to Walmart at 9:45 to get 45 red and yellow hangers, but they had to be equal. My LBs and I had no stories about being on line. The only thing we could say was that we studied information, partied, and hang out with bitches on the weekends. That was our process. I was a little upset about not being hit. There is this epidemic about being hit on line. Being hit aka "being made," means that you've earned your letters. I stood there wondering how it would be if we did get hazed. How long would it have lasted and would I have made it through to finish line? I slammed my laptop down and got back into bed and fell back asleep.