STARDUST

My Boy • XXII

I carried Lianna up the stairs to our apartment, the keys in my mouth. She was playing with my Braids delicately while I fought back tears, putting on a smile for her sake.

The secret was finally out.

Or the lie was finally exposed.

Either one would work really.

I opened up our door and Lianna struggled out of my arms, carrying her doll along with her as she hopped onto the couch. I put the keys down at the table by the front door and went over to the curtains, pulling them open to let some light in.

My emotions were mixed. On one side, I felt major relief that Kento finally knew. But I think I feel more despair than relief. He probably hates me now, but I knew he would call. And I knew he would do it soon, once he got everything sorted out.

Hell, I wouldn't be surprised if he called tonight.

And just like that, the phone rang while I looked at it incredulously. I looked at the caller id and breathed a sigh of relief when I saw it was only Mel.

Good, I need someone to talk to.

I retreated to my bedroom and pressed the talk button.

"Mel, I messed up," I said with a sigh as I sank down on my bed, my free hand coming to my hair.

"What happened? Is Lianna mad at you or som-," I cut her off.

"Kento found out."

"Because if she is, just give the pho- WHAT!?" And for the second time in five years, Mel yelled in surprise.

Tears blurred my vision again, "Oh God Mel. He found out."

"Wha...how?" Her tone was softening. "Did Lianna pick up the phone or something when he called?"

"No, just...no. He's here, Mel. He's doing a book signing and I saw him there because I promised Lianna I would take her today."

Of course, I left out the part where I knew he was already going to be there.

God, what was I thinking?

"Go on," Mel said.

"He saw Lianna and I think he just..." I sighed, looking around my small bedroom.

"Maybe he just knew, Raya," Mel sighed.

I shook my head. "Everything's falling apart. God, I just...I don't even want to know what Kento is thinking right now."

"Raya..."

"Not to mention that we kind of had a little spat outside of the bookstore. People were watching. And I don't want his image on the line for that either." I paused and took in a breath, looking downwards, "And just wait until people find out he actually has a daughter that he didn't even know about. Oh God."

"Raya, just breathe. Okay? Everything will work out. You'll see."

"No, not this time," I said sadly.

"Raya, the guy is practically in love with you. Okay? And knowing Kento, he probably already loves Lianna even though he hasn't said one word to her in his entire life. Me? I say screw all this drama, fuck each other, and be happy!"

Despite everything, I burst out laughing. Mel would always know how to cheer me up. We talked for a few more minutes before we hung up.

I stared down at the phone, then down at the floor before making my way out of the room. I placed the phone back on the receiver.

"Momma," Lianna's timid voice called out. I looked at her but she didn't look at me; she was playing with her doll's hair.

"Yes darling?" I asked, leaning over the couch on my forearms. I tucked some hair behind her ear and waited for her question.