Bad Blood - (Fransykes)

Chapter five

A/N: Hello my loves, sorry about the wait on this, having four ongoing stories is an absolute nightmare and I can never keep up with them 🤷 But here's an overdue chapter by the one we do not speak of lmao

This chapter is highly inspired by many BMTH songs; Drown, Suicide Season, Fuck, It Never Ends and many more.. so yeah, a few lyric references will be popping up here and there throughout the chapter.

Trigger Warning: This chapter contains thoughts of suicide, drug use, hallucination and heartbreak. 

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Oli's pov

Flashback  ~ Seven weeks ago

The very moment Fuentes left the room I got an god awful sinking feeling appear instantly in my chest and it scarily felt like as if Josh was wake the whole time and heard everything.

Immense guilt kicks in and now was consuming me whole as I start to have second thoughts about the despicable deal I just made with my once most hated enemy. Was this dark unrecognisable feeling regret or was it fear?

I swallow down the lump in my throat as my body shook with nerves. I reluctantly turn around dreading what may await me from the hospital bed I sat beside for the past week. My sorrowful gaze fell back on my sleeping beauty who just like for the last seven days, lays unmoving and fast asleep.

The room suddenly turns cold, a sense of unforgiving surrounds me and though, heavily asleep in his world of slumber I had a horrid feeling he knew exactly what I've done and he was silently judging me for the sins that I have made.

"P-Please don't hate me, I-I can't do it without you-" I choke back on my tears. "This is the only way I can keep you both safe." I explain in a small voice coated with guilt.

He lays perfectly still, the deafening silence which came from him screams traitor loud and clear and it awoken an unexpected rage inside of me.

"H-How am I suppose to raise him? How am I supposed to live without you? I- I can't! Not without you, I just can't!" I snap in anger and glare at the unresponsive body which lies before me.

I'm met with silence again. Not a single sound or twitch of a muscle came from him. He was frozen. Stuck in a world of endless slumber and as much as it hurts my aching soul I knew deep down that my sun wasn't going to rise anytime soon... or maybe ever again.

"Please wake up, please! Just wake up, Josh! I'd do anything, j-just come back to me." I cry out sadly. I yank at the strands of my hair when he doesn't even flinch at my desperate pleads.

I could feel the hole in my soul growing deeper and deeper and I can't take one more moment of this awful silence anymore! It was excruciating to watch him never wake up...

I let out a painful gasp of air just from the thought. I clench my jaw and gritted my teeth as I desperately try to hold back the reality of my emotions. I knew what I had to do. I could no longer go on in this miserable world without him.

He left me here all alone. With no indication of what to do if I was to lose him... I didn't prepare myself for this. I'm so fucking stupid, I knew not to grow close because this is the reality of my world, and if you care you're only asking for trouble and a lifetime of misery! I was foolish to allow it to happen to me!

I stare hopelessly at my darling sunshine, the pain becoming unbearable to carry on living with. I'll never heal from this, not that I want to but if he was gone then I wanted to be gone to.