Death Alpha

Anger and embaressment go hand in hand

He stays in that position. I scowl at him. "That's not fair Azrail move." But of course he dosn't. "I yank my legs but he holds thems still. "Alpha, please let go." He growls lowly before getting up.

He stretches to his full height and I am momentarily thrust into darkness by his looming figure. My mind is on speed wash, flipping and twisting around, the daze of...whatever that was leaving and being replaced by embarrassment.

"That was mean, and you know it." I huff pulling my legs into a criss-cross-applesauce. "You knew I was embaressed from this morning." He laughs. "Um no. Actually I heard you at school."

 I scowl harder as I remember the man from earlier. "I told you he could read minds." Azrails voice is full of amusement. He even has the audacity to smile, but then I remeber he's an Alpha, and i'm an omega.

HE can smile whenever he wants and I. Me. No I can't. 

So I don't. I turn and get up. "Yeah, so funny." I mutter before grabbing cloths for a shower. 

The tears from before are back but this time I let them fall. I slam the bathroom door shut as hard as I can and lock it. I rip of the shirt and undergarments before stepping into the shower. The warm water falls down and I wipe away my tears.

You may think it's childish. That i'm upset about being embarrassed, but it's not just that. I've built up this fantasy for my whole life about school, I watched movies and even used to ask my brother about it. Of course I would be thrown in the cellars for it but I asked more than once.

I thought having a mate would be smooth sailing, yeah he's nice but somtimes he's mean. Like now. Sure I made a mistake but that dosn't mean you can go and embarrass me because I am an inexperienced....CHILD!

See I have this problem of building things up to what there not. I know i'm doing it with me and Azrails relationsh-No. It's more of an aquantaince-ship, And this fantasizing needs to end.

I need to grow up, learn what it's like to be free from that shackling fear of being thrown into the cellar for one simple mistake, I need to get used to the fact that  I don't have cuffs on my neck and ankles, and realize that my childlike daydreams are nothing more than that. A daydream.

Imagination.

And that what I want in life, what I long for, and what i've wished for since before I could read, are never-ever going to happen. So it was high time I sucked it up.

I put shampoo in my hair hair and washed it quietly. 

I wasn't exactly in the singing mood but showers had this power of making you want to sing. Even if your pissed. So I sang the song the old woman in the cellar used to sing:

If kisses were raindrops

I'd send you showers,

If hugs were seconds 

I'd send you hours,

If smiles were water

I would send you the seaaaaa,

And if love were a person, 

I'd send you me.

Oh darling if only it was like this, you would be in my arms, forever and a day. Forever till the end of life. Forever till the sun ceased to shine, forever till the end of all time, because my precious that's our love.

I finished and turned of the water. That old woman was so nice. I wonder were she went. She was always there to take care of me, always. And I had left her behind.

I sigh and wipe my watery eyes and dry of before dressing again. I had to apologize for slamming the door and running out. I tie up my hair and hum the song again. "La la la la...." 

><><><><><><><><><

Okay so you got more insight into her mind. It's childlike so be warned.

Any way so that old woman is important soooooo... Remeber her. Also how is it so far??? I wonder. I know I suck at writing but I think I might actually finish this book! I thought about taking it down but now...I think i'll kepp it up and finish the Whol Entire Series just for you guys!!!!!

Bye for now and, I love you my sexy beasts!!!!

Wonderland890

p.s 

Sorry about any grammar, i'm going to go back and edit the whold book once it's done so, stick around