A Bond That Can't Be Broken

Suicide Note

Brothers POV

I'm finally at the interview and I'm terrified but I know Hannah would've been proud of me. I'm at the news station to talk about Hannah and her life.

"Thank you for joining us Timothy,"she says kindly with the biggest smile on her face. "Thanks for having me,"I say a little nervously. I clear my throat and wait.

"Well you told us that you wanted to let everyone know why Hannah died. Well why she took her own life so please tell us?" She said rather enthusiastically. Hannah's death has been the talk-of-the-town.

"I just need people to know that she isn't another one of those cases where she died for no reason, she's a hero. She'll always be a hero in my heart because that's what she is,"I say with tears in my eyes.

I relate everything that happened to her the whole time she was alive. "Wow!"she says and everyone starts clapping. I'm extremely happy that everyone took it so well. "Most people kill themselves for other reasons though it's not trivial but seriously this is hardcore. I never though it would be so real,"she says flabbergasted. I smile wide and tears roll down my face.

She then looks at me sadly and then says, "You said you wanted to read her suicide note. Do you still want to?" I am not sure honestly. I still nod though. Hannah's life is nothing personal anymore, it's the whole world's story.

Hi it's Hannah! I'm writing this to Timothy Davis. I've thought long and hard about this, I've made you hate me. I hope you did when I died. I hope you didn't feel hurt. The reason why I took my life is because of everything I've been through, then having to relive it again. It's not easy. I'd rather die then remember and see events that have already happened again and again. You wouldn't understand. You never had to see your sister die but you had to see her body. I saw her die and you saw the end result so can you imagine what I witnessed.

The kid was already dead and they wouldn't stop. They were so blood-thirsty that I thought I'd die too. They discussed killing me, I know it's weird not to explain why I did it but you know why. I thought I'd reveal stuff you don't know. Like similar cases of your sister. My 'guardian' was very blood-thirsty he just wanted me and everyone dead. The thing is, me, he wanted to use me, he couldn't get enough of my pain. I saw the happiness, the glow, the spark in his eyes when he saw me in pain, suffering, nearly dying. It was his drug.

I had to die because of my pain but also because of yours. I had to die cause I'm not the sister you should have or have wanted. I'm also protecting you from everyone who's after me. People like John and my guardian are at the bottom of the list, they aren't the most dangerous but they can be tracked since those people are dead. I'm in danger and I'm endangering you because they know me. They want me. I'll never be able to live in peace like you want me too and neither will you.

I'm sorry that I left you like Tobias and Lily did and I know it was my choice but I couldn't bear it anymore. The guilt of killing everyone I've ever known is eating me up from the inside so I decided to kill it the only way I can, by killing myself. It's weird logic but it's the only logical way to go for me. There's no way out.

If everyone found out about how many deaths I caused without knowing they'd hate me, they'd sell me out, they'd put me in prison for years without trial. I'm no civilian, I've never lived that life long enough to understand all the rules but I'm sure they'd convict me as a felon and I'd commit suicide anyways. I'd rather die while I have my reputation standing.

I know you think I'm your hero, you used to say that a lot. I'm really not Timothy. A hero doesn't kill people! Nevermind, I know they do but not purposefully. I've done it purposefully sometimes and I know you'd say I was forced and I was. Sometimes I just killed them without threat because it became a lifestyle, no threats were needed anymore, I also did it to protect myself mostly.

The guy made me believe that the guy who was to be killed would tell about what I've done if I don't kill him. I did it just for that reason. I'm a murderer, no one should believe anything else. I deserve the title. Hannah the Murderer. It's kinda like when someone is abused so long that they don't realize that they have no self-worth, no love and no happiness. They are so blinded cause they're so used to it. That's basically me. I became so used to a certain lifestyle that I felt I had to live it and sometimes I wanted to live it because I thought of one thing, myself. I thought the most selfishly. I thought about how my parents would feel when they heard all these things about me and that everyone would stop looking for Hannah the Murderer.

They'd think it was my choice to leave, that I planned the whole fake kidnapping so I could get away so I could live a life that everyone would hate. I'd be condemned. When it slowed down for awhile, I was happy. Then my opportunity came and you know everything went downhill from there. No one could leave me alone to live my life. The life I was torn out of.

I explain everything that  happened in my book. I called it A Bond That Can't Be Broken. Honestly Timothy, our bond will never be broken but I have to leave so you and your family won't break because of me. I can't live knowing that your hurting. That someone is constantly hunting you down. So many secrets. I hope you add to my story. Add your feelings during that time. Make my story longer. Fantasize it if you must.

Add me to every detail of what happens in your life. Imagine me there but don't get obsessed. I know I hid alot and there's a lot you still don't know Timothy. I have to take them to the grave with me because it's safer for you and your family to never know some things. Some things have to be hidden. What happened to your sister is only a fraction of what I saw them do. Timothy, don't search for answers. Live life.

I hope you heed my warning. I know what it's like to live in danger. I know you are part of a gang, I hope you take my warning and come clean, take yourself out of that place. Keep your parents safe, do the same for them. Free them from this sadness, from this loss. If you guys were never a part of a gang you would never have lost Lily but you also would never have found me. I hope Lily and I live on in your heart and we're remembered, added to everything. Your wedding, your kids lives, your vacations, your college. Everything! Everything I ever wanted, do it! Live it! Finally set me free by setting yourself free. Set me free by doing things I've never done.

I love you and miss you.

P.S I wish I didn't have to leave you but it's for the best.

Love Timothy Davis