Blair, Boys and Butterflies

16.

      Her period is late? Then that means... But how is that possible? When did this happen? I have so many questions.
     Edie and I look at each other wide-eyed.
     "Are you sure? Did you check?" I say, grabbing her hands.
     "No.. I'm too scared. I can't do this" tears start falling from her eyes.
     "Don't be. We're here for you. We'll help you" Edie softly says, wiping her tears.
     "Thank you guys" she sniffs, cracking a little smile "I'm glad I told you now"
     "No problem" I smile.
     "Can I ask who did this to you or is it too soon?"Edie pipes in.
     I hit her hand, opening my eyes wide. How could she ask her that? Abby barely told us this.
     Abby chuckles "It's okay" she squeezes my hand and mumbles "It's probably Noah"
     "What? Noah? Really? The rugby captain?" I ask in disbelief. Well, then again, I shouldn't be surprised. That guy toys with every girl he sees.
     "What happened with Eliot?" Edie asks in the same tone as mine.
     "Well... Remember the party we went to where you slapped him?" she asks.
     "How can I forget that" I sigh. It'll be engraved in my memory forever.
     "Well after that, I felt very sad and vulnerable and... I don't know... Noah approached me first. I didn't know what to think and just... did it" she purses her lips in a tight line "I can't believe I lost my virginity to Noah out of all people. And now I even might be pregnant" she starts to cry harder.
     "It's okay. You didn't know what you were doing after being hurt by Elliot. You'll be okay" I say hugging her. Edie joins us and we all stay like that for a couple of minutes.
     If she really is pregnant, I'm afraid for her future. Yeah, sure, she'll finish high school because there are only two months left but she wants to go to college too. She wants to become a fashion designer in the future. I don't think that's possible with only high school education.
      And how will she tell her parents? They're very close-minded and stubborn people. They would be very disappointed in her. I just hope they don't leave her out on the streets.
     This talk reminds me of the night with Eliot. Will this same thing happen to me? I hope not. I don't even know what exactly happened. Please God, don't let this happen to me too. I mean, I'm not a virgin but maybe that has to do something with it? Maybe virgins are more likely to get pregnant with unprotected sex than people that already had sex? 
     What kind of logic is that? 
     Shut up. I'm trying to console myself.
     I sigh. I should stop thinking about this.
     "Guys, I'm going to walk Lumi close by. I need to clear my head" I say, getting up.
     "Okay" they both said. I give Edie a look that says "Keep an eye on Abby" as I turn around. She nods.

     As I walk around the neighborhood with Lumi, I spot a drugstore. I need to check if I'm pregnant too, right? I contemplate for a while and finally decide to buy a pregnancy test. I need to confirm. I don't think I am because I didn't feel sick even once but sometimes you don't need to feel sick to be pregnant. I don't know.

I did it. I peed on the damn stick. I let it sit on the washing machine as I cover my eyes, waiting for the result. After a minute, a thin single red strip shows up. What did it mean again?
I grab the box I threw in the trash can and read the instructions.

"One red strip meaaans.............. I'M NOT PREGNANT. OKAY. OKAY" I huff. Thank GOD. A relief fills me as I calm down my beating heart. I need to tell the others about this fiasco. I feel my pocket for my keys and I realize that my car keys that I always keep in this jacket's pocket aren't here. Maybe I've misplaced them? I start patting my other pockets. Nope, they aren't in my jacket.
      I rush to Edie's house. Maybe I've dropped them there.
     We look around but they're nowhere to be seen.
     The car is home but I always forget to take out the keys.
     "Guys, I'm going to head home to check if they're there. See you later" I rush out the yard. I can't lose my keys. I don't have spare ones. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit.
     I look e v e r y w h e r e in my house. They aren't here. I feared this. I wore this jacket at the party too. Why are you so stupid Blair? Why didn't you take the keys out before going???? I'm so mad at myself. I hate when I lose stuff. I have to get Maddie's address. How can I forget that too?
     "Hey Edie, do you have Maddie's address? I think I've lost the keys at the party and I forgot where she lives" I call her.
     "Yeah, just a second. I'll text you" she responds.
    "Okay"
     As I wait, I sit on my porch cuddling Lumi.
     "Can I just be a dog like you? Look at you. You're so happy wiggling your tail and not caring about a thing" I sigh.
     She looks at me and starts licking my face.
     "Okay okay, I love you too" I chuckle, pushing her away. At that moment I get a text from Edie with Maddie's address. I get up and head there.