A random book

11. Was I the only one?

You stand here untethered.
I stood there before you,
already there to surrender.

I was mesmerized, hypnotized.
Being with you, I forgot all about myself.

What happened to me?
Where am I?
I don't know.

You left me all alone,
Told me you were there for me,
But when I needed you I had no one to hold.

Your words so caring, yet just words.
You brought me in, I felt cared for.
But when you didn't want me at all was when you dodged me, why date me?
I felt guilty for opening up,
your reaction to me made you go untouched.
"don't open up too much or he'll walk away".

I needed to know the truth.
It was not planned, but I needed to know you.
You were holding back, you didn't want to try.

Everyone always asked me about you,
"Why, Why, Why?" Thats all I ever heard.
I'm trustworthy, I promise.
I might fight a little but I swear I'm honest.

I never wanted to hurt you,
I never wanted to lose your trust,
But what you were doing to me,
I couldn't tell anyone because it hurt so. damn. much.

I begged and pleaded on my knees to be heard.
But you went unfazed,
I was a ghost to you,
shunned as if it was a lesson to learn.

I slowly realized while on my knees,
I'd no idea what happened between you and me. I gave her consent hesitantly.
It was forced at the beginning but she was going to do it anyways,
for my protection of course,
you can't blame her.

It broke my heart I was left alone.
It broke my heart, that you were my home.
I had to leave you,
I can't stay here and watch you do it again.
It was either that or you ghost me,
but it was never the plan.