**Alex's P.O.V**
"Well what did he say?" I ask Leven jumping off the couch as soon as she walks in the door.
"A lot." She says taking a deep breathe. "He's always drunk according to Emma and he is talking to Taylor again." She tells me.
"He's talking to Taylor again?" I fall back on to the couch feeling defeated.
"You cant expect him to wait around for you Alex." She says sounding really harsh. "Look, you know that I always pick you but this time, I have to pick Logan. You should have told him and I dont blame him for talking to Taylor again. He deserves to be happy whether it is with you or not. It is not his fault you broke up with whats his face! Logan deserves to be happy!" She exclaims. She is right. I have put that boy through hell and I am mad that he is talking to Taylor again. Leven sits down next to me. "I'm sorry." She sighs.
"No, you are right." I tell her. She smiles. "I'm not saying that again you idiot." We both start laughing. "But seriously what should I do about Logan?" I ask her. She doesn't say anything so I wait quietly for a response. "I just cant find it in myself to trust him and I really want to but I cant and I dont know why! He has stuck by my side through everything while I leave him every other day. So why cant I trust him? He shouldnt be able to trust me but he does and I dont get that." I find myself to just keep talking, not letting Leven get in one word.
"He loves you Alex and he would do anything for you even if that means waiting for years. Logan would wait. He would wait and wait and wait because he is so madly in love with you and it kills him when you dont trust him but you cant just force yourself to trust someone. Trust doesnt work that like. You have to believe that he isnt going to leave."
"Ugh." I groan. "Love is stupid and so are boys. I dont know what to do!" I exclaim. "Tell me what to do Leven. I need help."
"I dont know and yes you do." She says. "So while I think about this, lets go get some food because I am starving." She exclaims standing up.
"You are always hungry." I laugh standing up next to her. "Food is always on your mind." I say tapping her head.
"I know." She exclaims.
We walk down the street, heading towards Panera. Leven mumbles something under her breath. I look at her but she just smiles. I look forward and see what she most likely mumbled about. Logan. My hands start sweating a lot. Logan his only with Emma which is good. Maybe he isnt talking to Taylor anymore. Maybe they aren't talking. Yea they probably aren't even talking. I am fine. I look back up. Logan is staring at me. I feel my heart start beating so much faster. We both reach for the handle for the door. Shit. I quickly pull my hand away. Logan sighs and shakes his head. He opens the door and gestures for us to walk in.
"Thanks." I mumble. He follows closely behind me. I start to walk to the counter but Logan pulls me back outside. "What?" I ask finally looking at him. He has bags under his eyes, alcohol on his breath, his hair all messy, probably from running his hands through it out of frustration. He looks awful and I am to blame for it.
"Seriously?" He asks me running his hand through his hair again. "I want to be with you but whenever things start working, you run away from me." He says. "We crash apart when you get scared and everything ends in piles of broken glass. Stop running from me. Stop being afraid of being happy." He says getting upset. "I am still here. Do you see me running? I want to be with you. I will always stay no matter how much you push me away. I don't care if you push away from me, I am staying, so either get a restraining order and accept that fact and let yourself be happy." He exclaims not moving.
I dont know what to say to him. My mind is spinning in a million different directions. I want to just grab him and kiss him but part of me wants to run from him and never look back. He sighs, dropping his arms and taking a step back.
"You know where to find me when you make up your mind." He says sighing. He starts to walk away but this time I am listening to my heart instead of my head.
"Logan wait." I barely get out. He turns around with tears streaming down his face. I walk to him and kiss him like my life depends on it. It is like one of those cheesy romantic movies. You know where the camera spins around us while we kiss. Yea those movies. "I'm sorry. I want to be with you." He cuts me off by kissing me again. "Thank you for waiting for me."
"I would wait a thousand years for you." He says smiling.
"I cant ask you to wait that long." I sigh smoothing down his hair.
"You dont have to ask me." He says pushing some hair out of my face. "I love you and waiting for you would be so much easier than trying to love someone else. You are my everything." He slides the ring into my hand and closes my hand over it. "When you are ready." He says before walking away from me. I look down at the ring and back at Logan.
I want to be with him, I do but I am just so afraid that things wont work out. I want to trust Logan but I cant find it in my heart to trust him and thats what scares me. How can I marry someone I cant trust?
**Logan's P.O.V**
I can tell she doesnt trust me. She doesnt trust that I wont hurt her or that I wont leave her. I want her to trust me. I want her to believe I wont leave her but I dont know how to do that. I have done everything I can. I have waited and waited for her and she still doesnt think I am sticking around. I walk back into the hospital with the subway bag in my hand. I find Taylor and hand her the bag.
"I think I ordered Panera." She says taking the bag and laughing a bit.
"Yea.. I kinda ran into Alex at Panera so I really didnt want to stick around." I tell her sitting down across from her.
"What happened?" She asks me as she takes a bite of the sub. "You still know my order?" She says sounding surprised.
"I could never forget any of your orders even if I tried and I told her that I would wait for her no matter how long it took and I gave her the ring and I walked away."
"You just walked away?" She asks looking up at me.
"She doesnt trust me." I sigh. "She thinks I will leave when things get hard. I dont know what else to do. I have done everything."
"I am not saying this as a jealous ex-girlfriend, I am saying this as a friend." She says which makes me think something I dont want to hear is following. "Have you ever thought that maybe it is time to walk away from the relationship?"
