Trying to get life back to normal for Peter wasn't easy. Although having a month break from school in order to clean it up did help. But in that last month he has refused to go out to do his Spider-Man duties, despite all of May's persuasion. Aunt May was worried for her boy hero nephew. Although she hated the idea of him in the probable face of danger, she understood he loved his job of helping something greater than himself and who was she to stop him from doing justice. Yet to see him refuse to go out because of fear and grief eating him alive, she was worried. No beyond that she was terrified that he'd succumb to a prolonged state of depression and oh how right she was.
In the past month, Peter Parker has repeated the same task over and over again. The first three days of the week stay at home, locked in his room sulking. On day four was cleaning day in May's attempt to set things back to normal by spiffing the place up only for the outcome to be the living room furniture moved a different angle in a clockwise motion. On day five play video games for 4 hours, read and study for another six, and die of boredom for the remaining hours. On day six head out to get groceries and necessities, visit Mr. Delmar and his cat, find the churro stand, and head home to find May's failing effort to make edible food, leading to him ordering in. And lastly, on day seven check in on Ned's well being, but avoid the topics of Stark's death and how he's coping. Doing all of this repeatedly for four weeks straight made him realize how truly mundane it was.
Peter came to the conclusion that in the last week, the fifth week, he would go back to being Spider-Man, not because he wanted to, but because he didn't wanna burden May as she already became more weary about his mental health. Breaking out of his previous cycle was hard, but he knew it was inevitable. If he wanted life to go back to normal, he'd have to go back doing things normal for him.
His Spider-Man duties didn't really break his previous cycle though. It was more like an added part to the day. Yet a lot has changed since he was last seen as Spider-Man. After the events of the newly called "decimation", the world became bare which gave many the oppurtunity to turn to immoral behaviors. There were riots, higher crime rates due to jailbreaks, lost of plantation, less food, less family, less friends, and just complete and utter chaos. So Peter, as Spider-Man, made it his duty to help anywhere he could doing anything he can. From helping out farms, to restocking items in the isles of many stores, to helping out in bakeries, and even entertaining the kids from their previous state of depression in hospitals. Anything he was able to in order to rid others of the haunting memories of the craziness from before helped him get back to his ideal of "normal". Too bad all of it was really a distraction.
Yeah, you heard right, a distraction. All of this good doing all over New York and not just in the small neighborhoods of Queens, was to distract himself. He wanted to get rid of the pain he was feeling in his heart and mind. It was only a matter of time before it could get to him. And that's what happened right as of the moment.
On the last day of the fifth week before starts up again, Spider-Man sits on the ledge of the rooftop of an old abandon building. The building was quite tall though. High enough to see all of Queens and beyond with his super abilities. High enough to make it seem like he could reach out and grab a star from the night sky. High enough to hear only silence and not the bustling city even in the dead of night. High enough to avoid all his problems and the misery that still tortured him from deep within. Or so he thought.
As he sat there analyzing the last activities of his duties and checking for anymore hassling occurences, he also looks out at the view in front of him. When he comes across no more danger he starts to relax. In front of him were the city lights that never failed to burn bright. To the right side of him down below was the darkness of a sleepy neighborhood. Something he realized he should be doing too, sleeping to wake early for tomorrow. When he looked to the left side of him, something caught his eye. On the side of a smaller building two away from where he was sitting on was a mural of non other than Iron Man with the mask only covering one side of his face as the other showed Tony Stark. It wasn't the first he saw of this. Since the news of Tony Starks death broke out, many have tried to contribute in their own grieving of the lost hero. Every where he looked, pictures of Stark were hanged or laid out with may things alongside it as peoples' ways of paying their respect.
Now the painting seemed simple enough right? Although that must've not been the case, because once Peter laid eyes on it, it triggered something in him. A feeling he'd been trying to avoid.
"And I... am... Iron Man."
The memory flashed before him and the pain suddenly became intolerable. He then heard everything Tony said to him till he could not handle it any longer. Peter looked up and closed his eyes thinking it would help to stop him from remembering the feeling that he tried to lock away. It didn't though.
When he looked up, more memories surfaced. These ones weren't the happiest ones. The first to appear was the door of his aunt and uncle's small apartment closing, but not without one last image of his parents walking out the door to who knows where with the promise of returning back to him. The next was an old friend of his who had to move. It was a heartbreaking goodbye that ended with an argument probably about something that was so simple. After that, the image of uncle Ben's face as he was shot right in front of him haunted him, because he knew back then he wasn't able to do anything about it other than stare in shock. Liz's dissapointed look on her face came into sight as he remebered the last time he ever talked to her again before she left to a new adventure called Oregon. Then, his own body dematerializing as he clings on to his mentor repeating the cries of "I don't wanna go." Finally, Tony Stark's body laying before him as Tony takes one last look of everyone around him before his last breath was faintly heard. It all went blank after that. For a second, he thought it was over. Until one last image of aunt May's happy, carfree face popped up and he pondered for a moment. What if.....
That's when he actually cleared his head of his thoughts. He couldn't bare to thik like that. When he came back to reality he looked out to see more darkness than before and reasoned that maybe it was finally time to call it a night. Maybe the little amount of sleep he knew he was going to get was the best distraction for him. Because that, that was Peter's process of healing, of coping. By avoiding his feelings and not ruminating on the traumas.
When he finally arrived back home, sneaking back in through the window as a force of habit despite May knowing, he plopped on to the his bed. He was exhausted, mentally physically, and mentally. He didn't even want to think of what lies ahead tomorrow as school would finally begin. The only thought in his mind that gave him hope for the next day was seeing his best friend, in physical form, once again.
A/N: So that was the second chapter. It might take a while for the actual development of Spideychelle's relationship but this is the build up that's needed. Michelle, Ned, and the other characters of his school will be introduced in the next chapter. Bye :p
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~ 𝑺𝒆𝒎𝒃𝒍𝒂𝒏𝒄𝒆 ~ | ✔︎
Fanfiction(Spideychelle) Peter Parker wears a mask, both literally and figuratively. Every heartbreaking moment in his life tends to add another layer to his mask, because he believes no one else should have to carry his problems. That was until everything c...
