as i fumble with my keys and insert it into the keyhole, i notice that none of the lights are on.
"yuta?"
but i didn't get any response back. the house felt dead.
i realized how cold it got as soon as i put my jacket on one the chairs near me. so i made my way to the couch as soon as i could, pulling the covers over me.
i fish for my phone, checking to see if he at least sent me a text message. but i was greeted with nothing.
no missed calls.
not text messages.
nothing.
i couldn't fight back the lump in my throat, or the tears in my eyes. i tried to wipe them away, but even more followed after and it became too much to take care of all of them.
as i kept my sobs silent, i kept thinking about how frustrated i was becoming with yuta and even how terrible i felt just being upset about it...
all rational thoughts of mine were being thrown out the window, and i began thinking the worst: what if johnny was wrong? what if he just didn't love me anymore?
and then takuya crossed my mind again. i thought of how much he reminded me of the old yuta.. how much he made me feel like he was still there—somewhere.
but those thoughts were abruptly interrupted when i realized what i actually meant. i looked down at my lap in horror at my thoughts and tried to take them back.
but you can't take back words.
