Allure

3- Ryon

“You say each footprint is for a time you got through it?”  I look at Tristen we’re both sitting on her bed, reading. A hobby we both enjoy she’s laying back against my bent knees while, I sit up against her headboard. It’s two in the morning an none of us have found sleep.

She clears her throat. “I was waiting for it. For you to ask your questions.” She sits up and fills the space to my left. “This one.” She pointed to the one at the very top. “Is for when nae halmeoni, my grandmother on my father’s side, she died January second, this year she told us she’d make it to the new year. And she did. You’ve gotta admire her stubborn nature.” She smiled the smile was incomplete. But warm. “This one ” she pointed to the one below “my Grandfather on my mom’s side.” She looked at me. “ We’re a pretty close knit-family, it hit as hard, that their deaths were so close together, I got them at the same time. Both of them have wings on the inside. My grandparents are angels definitely.

“The middle one, my little brother had an extreme allergic reaction after being repeatedly stung by bees. It was terrible, he was 6 at the time, he’s 8 now.  He was outside playing and he’s not one to shy away from nature. I was terrified he was in the hospital for two weeks before the doctors made any definite progress.” I examine that foot print carefully.

“There’s another footprint inside.” I say once I find it.

“Yep. He took that step with me, He got me through it, no one else would’ve.”

“This one is for my first heartbreak. Real actual heartbreak. As in tears and sickness. It happened a little before my brother. And it was a girl who did it.”

“And this one is for when I first told my parents I was attracted to girls. My dad lost his mind. My mom was open minded. But the moment I said it. My dad started laughing and shaking his head.” She looked off. “ ‘No. You don’t.’” she looked at me. “His voice was scary, too Ry, and If looks could kill I would’ve died a thousand times and it took him a year to get over it. But about 7 months after I told him I got the tattoo. I was a daddy’s girl, but I figured hey I’ve made it this far and I’m cool, Daddy’s going to hate me for a bit but I’m way too happy with my Girl to even give half a fuck about how he feels, He’ll be here when I need him, I know that for sure.”

“I’m sorry you’ve been put through so much.”

“Don’t be sorry I went through it, be glad I got out, People have it worse.” She’s absolutely right.

“Do you like girls, Ryon?” she squinted at me through her glasses and raised her right eye brown.

“I might.” I said emotionlessly.  Getting back to my book.

“Hmm.” She pulls a grape between her teeth and plops down on the bed, her shorts generously exposing the back of her thighs and her perfectly manicured bare feet gently caressing each other. Something about her makes me feel insecure and daring all at once. I try my hardest to focus on my book.