Falling out of love

Chapter 12.

Staying back at Sheild was tough for them all, they all could leave, but none of them were willing to. The air was thick now, and it almost felt hard to breath in certain areas of the facility. 

No one was talking about what happened, no one could really get the words out anymore. Not to mention the pain that comes to them when they do talk about it. 

It was tough for Steve. His wife was in so much pain, but he couldn't do a damn thing to help her. She didn't want him around her, she didn't want him to comfort her. Not this time, and right now Steve wasn't sure if that time would come again. 

The other Avengers saw the Steve was becoming desperate to talk to Natasha, but she wouldn't give him the time of day. They had to talk to him now. So they all came to lunch, as always, in the private area and then Tony began to speak out first. 

"How are you doing Cap?" He asked, Steve almost wanted to laugh. It was a simple question, but what if you didn't know. what if you can't be okay because the person who you love more then anything isn't okay. What if that is what is preventing you from being 'okay.' 

"I don't know," he admitted, and that was the truth. 

"It's going to be okay you know," Tony said but something triggered Steve. 

"It's going to be okay? How can you say that? This is all the opposite of okay!" Steve said suddenly raising his voice. 

"Look, Steve," Clint Started. "There is nothing really left to say," 

"We can say it's our fault! Because that's the only truth there is! We all failed her! We all knew that going on this mission would affect her yet none of us stopped! We only cared about losing her! We were selfish because we wanted to protect her so we wouldn't go through that pain, well guess what we lost to a fate worse than death!" 

"I wouldn't say that," Bruce started. "She just needs time Steve." 

"Time? How much time exactly?" he shook his head. "There is not enough time in the world to make her forget about what happened." 

"She will move on," Tony tried to reassure. 

"No, she won't! It's going to haunt her dreams till she pushes us farther away than she already did." 

"We can try and do something-" 

"There is nothing we can do! NOTHING." Steve slammed his hand on the table in stress. Steve felt his own pain, but he was sure nothing could compare to what Natasha was feeling. "How is this so easy to you guys! How can you act like...like nothing is even happening!" 

No one had an answer to that. No could say anything that could explain themselves. They were all hurting, yet none of them could explain the emotions they were feeling because it would just be selfish. Yes, they were in pain, but Natasha was going through so much more. More then any of them will understand. 

Steve felt a hole. A hole in his stomach, he loved Natasha but as time was going on he was slowly losing her. Steve lost everyone he ever loved. Maybe that's why he was so protective over her. He couldn't lose her too. 

He got up when no one was brave enough to utter another word and began mindlessly walking to Natasha's room. The closer he came the more aware of the time slipping from the both of them. If he lost her, he wasn't sure if he would ever be happy again. 

Coming to her door he lightly knocked on her door. He knew she wouldn't answer the door, he could easily walk into her room, but he wouldn't do that. He would respect her wishes.