Little Old Me (not my Story!)

Chapter 6

AL CREDIT TO THE ORIGINAL WRITER

Emma was in school again, just two more Lesson, Maths and French, And Emma could go back home. She tried to pay attention to the Math Teachers Words but after some minutes her mind eventually drifted off again and she found herself thinking about something way different than Maths. The Calories showed in her Mind and she felt like a helpless animal being pushed into any corner with no chance of escaping. Self Harm, Bulimie, Suicidal Thoughts, anxiety and Depression, surely not a good mix but she would live with it, she had to. She looked down at her sleeve covered Arm and slightly pulled it up just for her to see the Red shining Cuts underneath. They were deep and it hurt with every Movement Emma did, the Pullover just always rubbed against it and caused her more Pain. As Emma looked back up at the Blackboard, she realized that the Teacher had already explained more than just that one Maths example, so she quickly wrote it all down. To her Luck she understood the Subject they did in Maths at that time pretty good, it wasn't that necessary for her to listen for the whole Lesson, Of course it would've been better but she couldn't help herself. She quickly did the exercises the students had to do before her gaze wandered to the Clock-12:45 o'clock, just five more minutes before the lesson would end. Indeed Emma hoped to see Miss Mills That day, if nothing came between it then she would see her in her last Lesson-French, yet she hoped just in case. Miss Mills really was everything Emma needed in that Moment. She felt the Emptiness coming back and immediately tried to fight it back, she really didn't want to ask for using the Bathroom in the middle of the lesson again, she really didn't want to have a breakdown at that time, not if she was that close to seeing the Person that could make it all better, the Person that basically was a living cure for her, even if it just lasted for a few moments. Most of the Students left the Class after the Bell rang, they mostly spent their Break outside or at the Corridors of the school chatting with other Students, Some others stayed in class and ate, talked or looked through some stuff again to prepare theirselves for the next Lesson. "Are you Alright, Emma?", Mr. Keller, The Maths Teacher asked as he kneeled down so he would be on eye level with her, since she still sat in her seat. Not trusting her Voice in that Moment, Emma just Nodded as she felt the Tears in her Eyes building up again. Don't annoy him with your Problems, he couldn't care less anyway. The Voice in her Head mentioned and Emma listened to it just like so often already. "Do you understand everything in the Lesson? Can I help you somehow?", He asked, Emma had to use her Voice for that Question and as shaky as her Voice was she silently answered:"I understand everything, Everything is fine, thank you.". Nothing is Fine, she screamed in her Head but as the Voice in her head had told her, she wouldn't annoy the young Teacher about it. Sure he was very sympathetic to her and she also would've loved to tell him, but he simply didn't deserve to have to worry about all that Crap called her Life, Emma Thought. He nodded again before he went out of the Class and just as Emma's Tears were about to fall again, he returned. He ran back in with a Small but yet so meaningful smile on his Lips as he kneeled back down to her. "Are you really sure?", He asked. Did he care? He came back...but he wouldn't care, would he? No, Of course not..nobody cares about you. The Voice in Emma's Head argued, Yet the young teenage girl tried to ask for help. Indirectly but yet. Instead of nodding or saying yes, she simply whimpered a small 'mh' as she fought back the Tears. The Teacher seemed to believe it since he said 'alright', gave her a small smile and went out of the Class again.