The Beast Within (Shinkai/Kaishin)

Sacrifices

"Oh god... Kudo what happened...?" Haibara blurted out, horror visible all over her face. Shinichi flinched lightly, shrinking a little on his seat while the female eyed up the bandages and patches all over her friend.
"Ah, w-well..." he stammered into his cup of coffee and the girl crossed her arms, clearly displeased.
"Kudo Shinichi."
Said one sighed and closed his eyes for a moment, slowly lowering the trembling cup in his shaking hands.
"You won't like it," he warned but Haibara was having none of it. She cut him off by raising her hand and flashed a glance at his shaking limbs. Shinichi was so nervous.
"Was it KID?" she asked, trying to sound as soft as possible but didn't even need an answer. It was obvious that this was KID's work.
"How could he hurt you like... this?"

Shinichi narrowed his eyes to avoid hers and sighed another time, suddenly the patch on the back of his hand was quite interesting.
"I basically sold my body to him."
"Shinichi!!"
Haibara stared at her friend, eyes wide. Impossible. Shinichi wouldn't have- Shinichi did. Oh god, it was so obvious he did. Haibara pursed her lips and sat down next to him, one hand resting on his thigh. Shinichi winced lightly and Haibara lifted it immediately away, worry flashing back and forth within her eyes. Even there?
"Is there any spot which doesn't hurt?" she asked sarcastically and shook her head, "Shinichi, why did you do that? What does it help you?"
"KID stays with me like that. I don't have to worry what might happen to him, whereever he was the entire time... or that he falls back into the hands of his captor... It's bearable and we're working every day to retrieve his memories. However..." He paused, trying to choose his words as good as possible, "Things are... difficult. KID doesn't seem to be able to read or see whatever I show to him concerning his alter personality. His eyesight gets so blurry whenever I show him a picture or report that he has to sit down because a headache overcomes him."

Haibara froze, eyes drilling into her friend.
"That's not normal."
"I know."
"Ran didn't behave like this. Shinichi, something-"
"I KNOW! I-I... I know." Trembling hands raked through his hair, the detective was utterly desperate. This wasn't a normal case of amnesia, he had seen Ran during her memory loss and worked with dozens of other patients during investigations.
"KID... I-I have the feeling he has been hypnotized. This desire to kill me without any logical reason behind it, the urge which can only be satisfied for a moment when he hurts me... The sudden disabilities if anything about his real self shows up... The memory loss... and the name of his 'partner', Snake. He isn't from the Black Organization and what KID told me about him doesn't seem like he is too intelligent like Gin or Vermouth."
Shinichi kept quiet for a second, teeth sinking into his bottom lip.
"He... he isn't faking it either. Whenever I show him anything... his eyes... his eyes become dull, milky, almost with a little speck of red. Have you ever seen his eyes up close? They have the most brilliant shade of indigo I have ever seen."
Haibara listened closely, secretly pitying her friend for putting up with such a hassle.
"Difficult... and you can't just drag KID to a hypnotist. You would sell him out... and there is no guarantee any other could actually help him. You would have to find the person who did this to him and force them to take it back."
Shinichi nodded defeated and leaned back into the cushions with a soft groan.
"I'm honestly stuck. I thought about asking other colleagues, maybe Hattori... but what could he possibly do?"
"True..."

Then, an idea hit her.
"Have you thought about asking Amuro? He had contacts to the BO and might know something we don't. Perhaps there does exist a second branch with animal codenames."
Shinichi dismissed that suggestion with a wave of his hand.
"Yes, I did. But think about it. KID is Japan's mystery number one and now that the BO is gone, the most wanted man. Do you really think a man from the NPA will pass such an opportunity?"
"Asking doesn't cost. You don't have to tell him we're talking about KID."
"He isn't dumb, Haibara. He will figure it out. Useful would be another person who worked against the animal codenames... But where can we find such a person? It would involve revealing information we might not want to reveal."
Flashing a glance at the clock, Shinichi turned a little bit paler and slowly raised himself from the couch.
"You have to go... KID will be hungry soon. I... I don't want you to see this."
Haibara swallowed and shot a last worried glare at her friend, getting up as well.
"...fine. This time. But I won't watch forever how he destroys you, got it?"
"Yes," Shinichi answered, leading her towards the door of the Kudo mansion. He closed it behind her and swallowed, eyes wandering up towards the stairs where a white figure became visible.
"Come join me, Meitantei...~"

Haibara paused at the gates and turned back towards the lonely house. Who could have known such gruesome things happened within those soundproof walls?
But she wasn't about letting Kaitou KID abuse her Shinichi. Even without his permission, she was going to visit Bourbon. After all... now that the Black Organization was gone, Bourbon wasn't her enemy any longer. She had to try it, else Shinichi was going to die sooner or later.

The detective didn't know about her thoughts. Currently torn between pain and exhaustion Shinichi watched patiently KID who tore one of his scars up again and was now observing with childish glee the blood and pink flesh below.
"H-hey KID..." he whispered, hand reaching out to stroke gently his cheek, "Do you know anyone... who ever had anything to do... w-with animal codenames...?"
KID looked up with a sweet smile, leaning into his touch like a smug cat.
"Something... I think I do... But..."
"But you can't remember," Shinichi finished his sentence with a quiet voice and exhaled shakily through his nose as another wave of pain hit him once KID's sharp nails dug into his flesh, tearing it open at another spot.
"Ah..."
"Shh shh..." KID cooed, pressing a kiss onto his hand, "You saw my face... did you find out by now who I am...?"
"I... I did."

KID silenced, fingers suddenly clawing deeper and drawing a pained hiss from his detective.
"Why didn't you tell me?" The voice was stern and quiet but Shinichi was too beaten to care.
"Because... if you returned to your old life... people would notice. Your friends would notice."
Shinichi blinked at him, trying to stay awake even if the relieving unconciousness was approaching faster than Shinichi wanted. KID hesitated, confused onto what Shinichi was hinting... and... did Shinichi always have such thick and beautiful eyelashes?
"KID... in your current condition... You wouldn't be able to hide yourself. And without me... things might escalate. You are insane. Completely and thoroughly insane, and we have to change this before you return back to your old life."
Shinichi smiled weakly at him, into those indigo eyes he came to see every single day. Perhaps it was the adrenaline, perhaps it was the exhaustion. Drunk in agony, Shinichi leaned in and pressed a gentle peek onto KID's lips.

"But insanity always fascinated me... Kuroba Kaito..."