Caught [l.s] (boyxboy)

IM Hesitant

dedicated to sarah because she dedicated to me <33 shoutoUtt to sarah, even if my author's notes are long i know she loves me anyway.

and today it occured to me that i almost never dedicate chapters to anyone. if you want me to dedicate a chapter to you, just ask. i'll definitely do it. don't be shy. i don't bite. 

OH AND GUESS WHAT I POSTED THAT MPREG SO GO READ IT IF YOU LIKE MPREGS AND IF YOU'RE COOL (if you're not cool it's okay i still love you) 

and i made some references in here so if you can find them a+ for you

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"Welcome home, Lou." Harry is too sweet, honestly, he is. Louis didn't ask him to be waiting at home with a plate of cookies in one hand and a bright smile that makes Louis want to shoot himself while he simultaneously wrecks Harry, but that's what he gets. He bites his lip and forces a smile as he drops his keys and kicks off his shoes. "Cookie?"

As he approaches Harry, guilt seeps through his veins at the kiss to the forehead he receives. Harry holds the plate out to him expectantly, smile fading as Louis shuffles awkwardly and stares at the floor. "Lou?"

His head immediately snaps up and their eyes lock in a way that shouldn't make Louis' heart flutter, but it does. "Yeah? Oh. Um, I'd love one. If you'd just wait-"

"Are you alright?" Harry doesn't know Louis was out with Lucas, is the thing. He had made up some bullshit excuse about going to get some gas in his car. For forty five minutes. And of course, being the supportive, loveable, trusting (idiotic, gullibe, influential) boyfriend Harry was, he had believed him. Louis feels like a dick, honest. 

He considers telling Harry. He really does. But that would just lead to more drama, drama that he thought he'd just manage to escape within the last week or two, and he knew Harry would definitely be upset that Louis had seen Lucas behind his back. Especially all by himself. Louis' bed is too big to be sleeping in alone, so he replies with a short and simple: "Never been better."

"Are you sure? You're looking a little pale." Harry sets down the plate and cradles Louis' face in his hands. Louis sighs against the skin of Harry's thumb. He can't lie to him. It's not his fault, right? He didn't kiss Lucas. Lucas kissed him. I didn't kiss him, he kissed me. It's not my fault, it's not my fault, it's not my fault. He'll understand.

"Actually, Harry, there is something I need to tell you," Louis begins. Harry cocks an eyebrow and leads him to the sofa, patting the spot next to him politely. Louis sinks down and when Harry's arm snakes around his waist, he melts a little inside. 

"It's about Lucas," Louis begins with a deep breath, but Harry's already shaking his head.

"Can we not talk about him? You know I don't like him, and you promised you'd stay away from him.. you are staying away from him." It's not even a question. It's like a statement. An order. Matched with a firm stare that has Louis squirming, Harry's words feel like a weight pressing in on his chest. 

"I - no, of course not," Louis lies. "I know how it upsets you. Um." Shit shit shit.

"Good." Harry visibly relaxes, settling back into the sofa and smiling back at Louis, who's uncertain as to if he can even stand being so close to his boyfriend at the moment without vomiting. What the hell was he supposed to do? 

Louis searches almost desperately for a distraction. His eyes land on the plate sitting on the table. "Are these chocolate chip? How did you know?"

Harry clears his throat as Louis leans across him (kindofsortofmaybe laying on top of him for a split second, but whatever) and snatches a cookie from the plate. "Well, I've known you for years. I'd be kind of offended if you didn't know my favorite kind of cookie."

Louis doesn't know Harry's favorite kind of cookie. He thinks he's gone even paler. So instead of answering, he shoves half of the cookie in his mouth and chews profusely. "Wow, 'arry, th's 'oo'ies 're really goo'."

"Lou, don't talk with food in your mouth," Harry tuts, poking him on the nose in a way that really shouldn't be as fucking adorable as it is, but Harry finishes it off with a giggle. Louis swoons. He really loves Harry (which is exactly why he's so panicked about the whole Lucas situation). 

"Sorry." He blushes, wiping at some of the crumbs around his mouth. Harry leans toward him with his lips puckered - probably to kiss it away - but nausea hits Louis so suddenly that he leans back away from Harry and stares at his with wide, blank eyes. Harry freezes and tries to adjust himself, masking his shock and hurt under a cough. Louis feels even worse - fantastic.

"I just - I have a nasty bug, Hazza, wouldn't want you to catch it." Louis adds a fake cough for emphasis, clearing his throat and scratching apologetically at the back of his neck. Harry nods, but it's not convincing in the slightest. Louis sighs. 

"Listen, about Lucas.." Harry's eyes flit back up to Louis'. They're filled with some kind of unidentifiable emotion, one that makes Louis feel more and more on edge as the seconds of awkward, heavy silence continue. "I.. ran into him today. At the gas station."

"Did you really?" Harry sits up a bit. "What happened?"

"Oh, nothing really." Louis shifts, but he feels small and pressured all by himself, so he takes one of Harry's hands in his own. Louis' hands are almost comically smaller than Harry's, so he has to curl Harry's fingers into his palm just to fit it into Louis' own hand. Honestly, it makes Louis want to wail, because Harry is his giant teddy bear and he's gone and fucked everything up - and now he's lying about it. Harry will never find out unless Louis tells him, right? No one saw them, they were in a bathroom. There were no paps around to catch Louis. Lucas certainly wouldn't see Harry, and even if he did, he wouldn't say a word to him about the kiss. "We just had a short little chat. His.. um, his cat died."

Harry's brow furrows cutely. "Oh."

"Yeah."

"That's.. that's too bad."

"Really is. It was an old cat, so. Y'know."

"Um.. why are you telling me this? Not that, um, not that I don't care about the cat dying. Because that's pretty.. tragic?" Harry bites his lip and it takes every ounce of Louis' willpower not to kiss him on the nose. 

"Well, I know you.. like.. animals.." Louis trails off, because even he doesn't know where he's going with this. "D'ya want to go out? Like, see a movie or sommat? We're always cooped up in this little flat, 's not gonna be long before we'll be out and travelling again. We should take advantage of the opportunity to do whatever we want."

"I suppose so," Harry scratches his chin. "What movie?"

"It doesn't even matter. As long as you're there. If it's shit, we can always leave. Or snog in the back of the theater-"

"What if there's paps? There's definitely going to be other people there. People who will recognize us," Harry thinks aloud. "London's... quite... big."

"Well, yeah. But. Y'know what? Let them talk. Let them spread rumors.. let them jump to their own conclusions. I want to do things with you. I don't care what other people see. You and I are all that matter as soon as we walk out that front door, alright?"

Harry blinks twice. "Am I talking to the same Louis that lived here a few weeks ago?"

"Yes. I'm a changed man," Louis announces, and Harry smiles. This time, when he leans in to kiss Louis, Louis doesn't shy away.

But the guilt is still there.